26 definitions by Larry and Rex and Benny
This term is obviously used after a 2-5 day bender when you know you are being irresponsible. It’s great with friends bc it’s funny but you know you’re in shit creek with your job.
Hey Jenny, you have to cover for me with the tiny tots on the monkey bars and the little ones on the roller coaster. I blew Steve til 8 am and feel like a medium adult today. Cover for me...please cover for me...
by Larry and Rex and Benny July 17, 2018
This is when, while eating a roast beef sandwich, you dip your balls in the au jus sauce and slowly stick them in and out of the girls mouth while she licks off the sauce.
Hey Pete! I took a girl to Subway in a first date the other night. She followed me to the bathroom because she wanted The French Dipper. Then she finished me by sucking me off on the toilet! Second time this week!
by Larry and Rex and Benny September 20, 2018
When you muff dive into a woman that is made of at least 55% body fat and come back out for air smelling like Nemo's abusive alcoholic uncle.
Hey Steve, you douchebag, after I took her out to a nice dinner at Popeye's we went back to her trailer where I gave her The 55 Gallon Fish Tank. Four showers later and I still can't wash her mush off my moustache. Overall, it was a great date with your sister. Asshole.
by Larry and Rex and Benny July 8, 2018
This is when you hate your life because you hate your job. Typically this is a result of hating your boss and you often find that you rant and rave about how he should be dead or in jail. So what do you do? You secretly invite his mother to the office on Mother’s Day and sneak into his office and have the dirtiest sex imaginable. Fingers in the ass...everything. But then the job isn’t done. Once you send her on her way you shit in his pencil drawer at his desk. Big steamer.
Time to wrap up. Quietly tiptoe out of there and punch that time clock. You’ve accomplished all you’re getting done today.
Time to wrap up. Quietly tiptoe out of there and punch that time clock. You’ve accomplished all you’re getting done today.
“Hi, Deanna?” It’s Jim from the front desk. Listen your son can’t talk right now, he’s in a meeting. But Happy Mothers Day! Why don’t you come to the office.”
...then you proceed to step on her face while you bend her over the desk...
“That was amazing, why don’t you go clean up. I’ll be right there.”
Steer clear of the office for a little while boys. I just did us all a solid and Motherfucked The Boss . You mind punching me out? I need a cigarette.
...then you proceed to step on her face while you bend her over the desk...
“That was amazing, why don’t you go clean up. I’ll be right there.”
Steer clear of the office for a little while boys. I just did us all a solid and Motherfucked The Boss . You mind punching me out? I need a cigarette.
by Larry and Rex and Benny February 5, 2020
The double blackout is when you go day drinking, and blackout for the first time before noon. You won’t know what happened but when you wake up there could be a stranger in your bed and you could be naked. That’s when you start to piece your day together and wonder what happened with the stranger. However, it’s only 4pm and your friends want to meet up. That’s when you rally. The probably ends with shots of tequila and throwing up in an alley outside some kind of shit smelling Indian restaurant. But you don’t know bc you just did the double blackout. The next morning is a rough one.
Hey Carey! I don’t remember shit. I feel like a dirty whore bc I woke up after my first blackout and couldn’t remember if I fucked this guy named Steve. He seemed cool though so we rallied. We were up until 6 am when I blacked out again, but the last thing I remember is sucking his dick in the last bar we were in. It was another of the double blackout for me...
by Larry and Rex and Benny July 15, 2018
Hey Brian. You may judge me because...you know, I’m homeless, and shit. It’s not pretty. But last night I drank a lava lamp and fucked a German shepherd. That may be no big deal to you but I won the gold at the homeless Olympics! So fuck you.
by Larry and Rex and Benny September 9, 2018
This is when, upon request, a woman asks you to take a hot poker...this can be in a situation when sitting by a nice fire or in a furnace room, it really doesn’t matter, and jamb it in her ass for at least 30 seconds and usually to climax.
Yo Phil! Can you believe this teenager asked me for a Nigerian Washing Machine?! I had no idea what it was but we were naked and she had just sucked me off. I kinda felt bad when she told me what it was, but she wanted it so...
by Larry and Rex and Benny September 27, 2018