4 definitions by Jake Seifert

A statistic used mainly by politicians to manipulate the facts to gain favor.
6 out of 10 Adams county students AREN'T drinking! (this statistrick used in an actual advertisement in Adams County, Illinois)

"I think Iraq is stable. New polls show that 95 percent of the country wants to see a democratic government." (The problem with this is that the other 5 percent have all of the weapons.)
by Jake Seifert March 12, 2006
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the feeling of complete happiness/understanding one gets from any number of things. Such things include listening to a mindblowing guitar riff, or seeing a person you hate get screwed, among countless other things.
After listening to Hysteria, I can hardly think due to the intense mindgasm it brought me to.

After hearing Kristin got fired, I laughed for two straight minutes and smiled for the rest of the week. It was purely mindgasmic.
by Jake Seifert March 12, 2006
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An ending that can be put onto the ends of stories and plans. A convenient phrase to use when your story or plan sounded really dumb. It usually doesn't make much sense.
Me: Ok here's what's gonna happen: I'll go steal her key's and she will spend the whole night trying to find them!
Other People: (stare)
Me: Hilarity ensues.
by Jake Seifert March 12, 2006
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What you say when a person stutters, or won't tell you something. Demeaning, because it equates them to a small child. Better if use with a "you can do it!" for mock encouragement.
Other Person: She was wearing one of those... you know, those whaddyacallums...
Me: Come on, use your words, you can do it!

Me: What do you enjoy doing?
Other Person: Oh, I don't want to tell you...
Me: No, use your words. You can do it!
Other Person: I enjoy killing hobos.
by Jake Seifert April 17, 2006
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