Frank Klaune's definitions

snorgasm

Frat-house term for an unsatisfactory orgasm. The term is often used to describe a relatively disappointing ejaculation (cum shot) in a pornographic movie.

Man, Frank bought that French porn movie and we thought it was going to be real cool, but in the end, it was nothing but a snorgasm.

by Frank Klaune March 5, 2004

farmer snort

Plugging one nostril by placing the index finger on it while blowing out the other one in order to discharge nasal mucus on the ground. The "farmer snort" is a quick, efficient way to blow your nose. Unfortunately, it's also a quick, efficient way to guarantee you won't get a second date either.

Damn, Frank was pretty glued when he was at Mike's house. First he farted out loud, then he did a farmer snort on the living room carpet. Mike dial toned him on the spot.

by Frank Klaune May 1, 2005

ring the bell

To severely hit or smack another person. One is usually in the hurt bag after having their bell rung. See dial tone.

Damn, when Frank told the chick that she was fat, she just rang his bell right there in the bar. Man, he hit the floor!

by Frank Klaune March 29, 2005

sippin penis

The term dates back to a camping outing in the late 80's where a friend of "House" (whom we called "Elvis") was having an inebriated conversation in which blowjobs (oral sex) was compared with whiskey. The analogy stated that you can have quick, nasty oral sex such as a quicky blowjob in a public restroom or in your car and that compares with the cheap, off-brands of whiskey which you also drink hastily and "chug" down. On the other hand, you have the finer, more desireable blowjobs where you are much more relaxed, take your time and truly enjoy the whole sexual experience much more, such as one done privately with some extremely hot girl you are dating. In turn, this compares with the finer, more expensive, quality bourbons which are poured into nice snifters or tumblers and sipped slowly at a special time and enjoyed much more- such as with fine Kentucky sipping whiskey. At this point someone asked "Elvis" if this meant that a quality blowjob meant you had a "sipping penis" and the group consensus was yes, indeed. A fine, quality blowjob was indicative of a "sipping penis". Of course, when "Elvis" used the term with his southern drawl, it was soon emulated with the spelling "sippin" and the penis term likewise pronounced in accord with the dialect.

Jennifer and I went on vacation. We spent the weekend in her folks' cabin and while watching the sun set on the porch, she gave me a knob job. Man, that was the best BJ I've ever had... she was truly sippin' penis!

by Frank Klaune December 16, 2004

choregasm

Sucessful completion of the sex act, but only after outrageously exhaustive efforts. Usually used to describe a rather un-satisfying sexual experience which one has been working very hard at achieving and, upon completion, does not think it was worth it.

"Lisa was playing hard to get. I had to take her out six times and spend a fortune on her to get laid, and then all she did was lay there and complain the wholetime. What a choregasm!"

by Frank Klaune November 22, 2003

chucklefuck

1) A bumbling, stupid, inept person.
2) A confusing mess; a conundrum; any chaotic situation
3) A person of low intelligence who gets himself into a comical quandary.

"Frank just took off for the store and forgot his wallet again. What a chucklefuck!"

"When the storm hit in the middle of the parade, the whole festival became one big chucklefuck."

"That chucklefuck Frank got drunk and drank from that shampoo bottle."

by Frank Klaune November 6, 2003

scrambled egg

Derogatory term used to describe a person of diminished mental capacity- formerly known as "retarded".

Damn, Frank is so impatient. He got mad when his McDonald's order got screwed up and yelled at the scrambled egg who took his order.

by Frank Klaune March 29, 2005