Definitions by Ford Leiden

Ninja Goggles 

When a ninja gets so drunk he or she fucks a pirate. The opposite of pirate goggles.

So we went to this dive bar by the docks for New Years. Big mistake. I got so drunk I thought I met this cute ninja chick, but I was just wearing ninja goggles. I woke up the next morning to the sound of a fucking parrot snoring "byarr."

Ninja Goggles by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

Pirate Goggles 

When a pirate gets so drunk he or she fucks a ninja. The opposite of ninja goggles.

So we went to this opium den by the docks for New Years. Big mistake. I got so drunk I thought I met this cute pirate chick, but I was just wearing pirate goggles. I woke up the next morning to seeing a karate chop from the corner of my eye, then she vanished without a trace.

Pirate Goggles by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

the You Game 

A word game in which the response to absolutely any statement can be "You're a ____"

1)
A: That's a horrible idea.

B. You're a horrible idea!

A. Don't you play the You Game with me!

2)
A. It's not Thursday today.

B. You're not Thursday today!

the You Game by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

Closeted Republican 

A self-proclaimed democrat or liberal who's actions and opinions more closely resemble a republican or conservative. Also called a fashionable liberal.

He's such a closeted Republican. He claims to be against the death penalty but joined up on that band wagon lynch mob without a second thought.

Closeted Republican by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

The Virgin Mary's hymen 

That which was ripped wide open and torn asunder when the Messiah was born. In keeping with the belief of immaculate conception, Jesus Christ must have been the one to rip his own mother's hymen, and in a way pop his own mother's cherry. This can be used as an explanation for his odd behavior later in life.
Many christians celebrate the breaking of the Virgin Mary's hymen on the 25th of December every year.

The Virgin Mary's hymen got all torn and bloody, hahaha.

The Virgin Mary's hymen by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

Badges 

Something Mexican Bandits with awesome sombreros don't need.

Badges? What badges? We don't got no badges. We don't need no badges. I don't need to show you any stinking badges!

Badges by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009

Fuck or Fight? 

the lowest, crudest thing that can be said while on a date.

Fuck or Fight? Those be your options.

Fuck or Fight? by Ford Leiden December 28, 2009