Faster Redhead's definitions

Blandjob

A lazy and boring handjob with no enthusiasm

Giving someone a blandjob is one way to make sure you won’t see them naked again.

by Faster Redhead October 31, 2017

Snorgasm

When you fake an orgasm so you can (finally) go to sleep.

I was so tired last night that I had a Snorgasm so I could finally go to sleep.

by Faster Redhead May 25, 2016

sedermasochism

The forced act of celebrating the Jewish holiday of Passover (seder) with your dysfunctional family (masochism).

Dreading the sedermasochism I will experience when I go to my parents house for Passover next week.

by Faster Redhead May 24, 2016

Weave queen

A woman who uses various hair extensions (clipped in, sewn in, bonded in), falls and wigs to achieve a sexy, glamourous look.

That girl is such a weave queen she could give Beyonce a run for her money.

by Faster Redhead June 16, 2016

Grief shopping

When you experience the loss of a loved one and drown your sorrow by going on a shopping binge.

When her mom died, Debra went grief shopping and accumulated three pair of Louboutin platforms and two Gucci bags in an attempt to spend the grief away.

by Faster Redhead May 21, 2018

Jewber

A Jewish mother who acts as a personal Uber to her kids, driving them playdate to dr appointment to dance class to etc.

I couldn't go out because I had to Jewber my daughter to the mall and then a friend's house.

by Faster Redhead June 18, 2017

Cockeoke

Pronounced cock-kee-oh-kee. Doing karaoke (singing) while giving a blowjob, with the vibrations adding an extra sensation to the BJ. Sometimes accompanied by holding the penis as. Microphone for effect.

Bernadette gave her husband a cockeoke blowjob, prompting him to say "don't talk with your mouth full."

by Faster Redhead July 5, 2017