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Empress Kristi's definitions

youtuber

greedy ass people who have a massive fanbase of simps who, to this day are still trying to find their OnlyFans...
Jake Poo: OK, but before i do this experiment, I have to thank our sponsor, RAID SHADOW LEGENDs~
82 years later
Jake Poo: Now, 3, 2, 1...
*2x 20 second non-skippable ad plays*
Jake poo: 3, 2, 1... TO BE CONTINUED!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT FUN!

me: i hate youtubers *proceeds to throw pc out the window*
hobo: oh hell yeah! free pc! can you pass me the wi-fi router too?
me: *throws wifi*
by Empress Kristi April 28, 2022
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Kim il-Sung

The first ruler of North Korea. Unlike his descendants he actually fed the people and tried to rebuild the country after the Korean War. It wasn't until Kim Jong-il came along that the country just descended into what it is now because he fucked up the whole country.
I can't believe people were forced to mourn after Kim il-Sung died.
mf he actually cared for his people, it wasn't forced mourning and people were genuinely sad, get your facts right
by Empress Kristi December 30, 2023
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Ligma

Ligma balls disease, more commonly referred as LIGMA, is a very rare disease that can be life wreaking, put you on life support for the next two decades and kill you.
Steve Jobs died of LIGMA. In 2069 there will be a cure to ligma. In 2069 we will be releasing a cure to ligma balls disease. The way to do it is for the doctors to bang your mom! HA! GOTTEM!” *dies of ligma*

- an anonymous person who goes by the name of P.H
by Empress Kristi April 18, 2022
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discord mod

a no life pedo who has an OCD in abusing his powers
Day in the life of a discord mod

5am: get dressed
6am: open discord
10am: go outside
10:01am: review suggestions
3pm: breakfast
5pm: exercise
5:01pm: check on the server
4:55am: bed

meanwhile:

boy and e-girl: *joins*
mod: *bans boy in 0.00000000001 seconds*
mod: *automatically gives the 'DMs open' role*
mod: be gf or ban
gf: ok
mod: where do you live? what is yor name? how old?

person: *posts memes in general*
mod: say goodbye (?mute @person#1337 5d L bozo)

22 years later

Guinness World Record: Most people banned in Discord in a lifetime - 74637281746732847 - goes to Mod#420 (1996-2069)
Guinness World Record: Most girls dated in discord in a lifetime - 758345745738549323893 - goes to Mod#420

How to get into a Discord Mod's Account

You can't.
by Empress Kristi April 29, 2022
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Ching Chong pass

A pass given by Asians to non-Asians so that they can say the word without being considered a racist. Includes the ‘eye pull’ and can either be unlimited or limited time.
Non-Asian man: ching chong wing wong willy wonka

Asian man 1: proceeds to pull out slipper
Non-Asian man: put it down..
Asian man 2: put it down. He has the power of ching chong on his side. I gave him the ching chong pass.
by Empress Kristi October 6, 2022
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uwuify

Changing words in a way that it is presented as some anime furry way.
Rick: How do I uwuify?
Morty: I wrote an entire essay on it and some examples...

The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
H-hewwo?? da quick bwown fox jumps ovew da wazy dog. ^-^

You have cannabis?
uu haz cannabis? :O
by Empress Kristi April 13, 2022
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discord

pedo: *receives 26 friend requests on discord*
girl 1: im 23 and~
pedo: no
girl2 : im 18 and~
pedo: kys
girl 3: im 14, and~
pedo: send nudes
girl: *send nudes*
pedo: nice pussy, face reveal
FBI: *reveals face*

pedo: ah shit, here we go again
by Empress Kristi April 29, 2022
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