EdgarLongstaff's definitions
A corporate apology following a backlash against an unpopular policy, devoid of any sincerity or contrition, and usually couched in PR language i.e. "We're so sorry if we upset anyone, this was never our intention and we strive to build the best brand for our customers"
These apologies are usually found on LinkedIn, and are primarily a tool to appeal to investors rather than customers, and the term can be used more broadly to call out any fake/insincere apology.
These apologies are usually found on LinkedIn, and are primarily a tool to appeal to investors rather than customers, and the term can be used more broadly to call out any fake/insincere apology.
Tina: Did Brad ever apologise for ruining over that minor league mascot during last week's charity 10k?
Sam: not really, he just posted a 'LinkedIn apology' on his socials saying he was sorry if anyone was upset by his actions, and he'll take some time to reflect before deciding whether to crash his car onto an athletics field again.
Sam: not really, he just posted a 'LinkedIn apology' on his socials saying he was sorry if anyone was upset by his actions, and he'll take some time to reflect before deciding whether to crash his car onto an athletics field again.
by EdgarLongstaff March 17, 2026
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by EdgarLongstaff December 25, 2023
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by EdgarLongstaff December 25, 2023
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Contraction of Wank + Consultation.
1. When you're unsure if you're attracted to someone, so you fantasize about them when having some "alone time" to help you decide.*
2. When you and a co-worker-with-benefits find an empty meeting room for a quick bit of hanky panky on company time.*
*Neither of these things have much in common with good decision making.
Contraction of Wank + Consultation.
1. When you're unsure if you're attracted to someone, so you fantasize about them when having some "alone time" to help you decide.*
2. When you and a co-worker-with-benefits find an empty meeting room for a quick bit of hanky panky on company time.*
*Neither of these things have much in common with good decision making.
1. Hmm do I really like this Eric guy? I guess consulting the spankbank for a wouldn't hurt my chances at finding out!
2. Hey Janet, you got 5 minutes? I'm stressed out about this deadline and I could really use a quick wanksultation in the breakout room.
2. Hey Janet, you got 5 minutes? I'm stressed out about this deadline and I could really use a quick wanksultation in the breakout room.
by EdgarLongstaff November 18, 2020
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