dick triscuit

When your dog is misbehaving, you yell "it's a dick triscuit over here" and promptly place your balls on your dogs eyes. You must quickly remove the testes before the dog notices.

Ben: Your dogs bein' a bitch.
Nick: It's a dick triscuit over here.
Josh: Now you see me, now you don't.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

Cattoo

A tattoo of a cat that makes a noise when you rub it. However, the tattoo must be on your dick.

Josh: Nice Cattoo man.
Ben: Why are you lookin' at my dick man?

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

The Randy Quaid Suprise

A very welcome punch to the cunt.

Mom: Hey Nick, how was school.
(Nick punches his mom in the cunt.)
Mom: Yahoo! Thanks for the Randy Quaid Suprise.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

drive-thru dick

When a man puts his dick in a hot dog bun and sticks it out a window. He waits for someone to notice and relishes the moment. Mustard optional, but manditory.

Ben: I'll take one foot-long hot dog.
Nick: That will be 4.28
(Ben pulls up to the window.)
Ben: What the fuck is that?
Josh: Looks like a dick to me.
Nick: You just witnessed a drive-thru dick.
Ben: Kudos. Man.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

Grandma's Hat

Unexpectingly placing ones dick on his/her grandmother's head.

Ben: Okay Granny, close your eyes.
(Ben places dick on granny's head. It's a classic Grandma's Hat)
Granny: Is that a dick on my head?
Ben: Happy Valentines Day! Don't touch it.
Granny: What?
Ben: Okay, touch it.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

Golden Microphone

Pissing on a complete strangers fist. Then yelling curse words into it.

Josh: Come here.
Ben: You just pissed on my fist.
Josh: Fuck! Cunt! Dick!
Ben: Danke Shane for the Golden Microphone.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008

Pube Tube

Attaching ones pubic hair to their television by any means nessecery.

Josh: Am I comin' over to watch to super bowl.
Ben: Yeah, we're watchin' it on the pube tube.

by Ben McLaky January 11, 2008