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Argonak's definitions

The Rack

noun:

A device to which a victim is strapped by their hands and feet, and then they are stretched opposite ways, so as to cause the dislocation of several body parts, and eventual tearing of the body.
The Rack can also be used to relieve back pain.
by Argonak April 12, 2008
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butt demon

1. A demon that emerges out of your asshole if you have anal sex.

2. A particularly nasty shit.

3. A backdoor pirate...AKA person who likes to stick their god given meat inside of other people's assholes.
1:
Pope: "If you have anal sex the butt demon will crucify you on your toilet."

2:
Zach: "I just left a godly butt demon in the toilet."

3:
Rodion: "Joey is a butt demon."
Tyler: "So is Brutis."
Rodion *shudders*
by Argonak April 15, 2008
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god given meat

An overexagerated term for a penis. This term implies that not only does said penis exist, but that God himself gave it to the owner.

Someone who is proud of his (or hers?) penis would use this term.
I will smite you with my God given meat, in the name of all things holy!
by Argonak August 14, 2008
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backdoor sledgehammer

This can mean many things, all of which are (as the name implies) destructive to the recipient's anal opening.

Noun: Something which is used to inflict massive anal damage (broomhandle, monster dildo, armadillo, shoe, etc.)
Noun: The actual technique of using a tool (as described above) to pound the victim's anal opening into submission.
"After being tied down to prevent escape, the man was given a thorough backdoor sledgehammer."

"I will use this lampshade as a backdoor sledgehammer if you come near my house again."
by Argonak October 11, 2008
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shit battle

History:
A direct derivative of piss battle. This type of battle was created when two piss battle combatants had a draw...that is, both bladders were burst. Neither contestant wanted to cease the battle so they decided to join their rectums in order to have a battle of the anal muscles.

1. The combatants join their anal cavities together and after forming an leaktight seal begin to push the defecate between eachother. These battles are often ended once one of the combatants has emptied their body of all defecate. At this moment the combatant may disconnect their anus from their opponent and claim victory.
Shit battles are epic.

Shit battles do not cause cancer.
by Argonak April 13, 2008
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Heretic's Fork

noun:

A medieval torture device which consisted of a two-sided fork which would be strapped to the victims neck so that any movement of the jaw caused extreme pain.

The victim was then forced to say the word "abiuro" which is latin for "I recant" or else they were hung or burned at the stake.

This device qualifies as a funkatron.
Tom: "I don't really think that god exists..."

Bill: "STFU or Im gonna tell the pope and he will strap a Heretic's Fork to your neck!"

Tom: "..."
by Argonak April 12, 2008
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poundatron

A robotic device (sometimes, but not always of a sexual nature) which pounds.

While officialy of a robotic nature, it is often used to describe anything that pounds, whether it is of organic or synthetic build.
"A jackhammer is a poundatron." -Synthetic example.

"A was a destructive poundatron last night." -Organic example.

"The city was pounded into rubble by the massive poundatron." -Bonus example.
by Argonak October 11, 2008
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