Definitions by A "Valued" Customer

cubicle withdrawal

The feeling of nostalgia or profound melancholy as a result of moving from ones restrictive cubicle to a slightly less restrictive office. Generally caused by the increase in seclusion for other human beings due to higher walls and a door. Loneliness

Murph: "Ever since Stu got promoted and moved into his office, he has been peering over my cube. He's weirding me out!"

Joe: "Don't worry. It will pass. He just has cubicle withdrawal."

cubicle withdrawal by A "Valued" Customer December 15, 2016

flash dominion 

The instantaneous feeling of power and authority felt by an individual who has just been promoted at work or recently accomplished some mildly difficult feat. This individual generally tries to appoint menial tasks which are now "below" him/her to his/her peers.

Murph: Man, ever since Stu got licensed he's been bossing me around. I had to make his coffee this morning!
Joe: His flash dominion is turning this place into a modern day feudal system.
*Stu walks by*: Get back to work serf.... I mean Murph.

flash dominion by A "Valued" Customer December 13, 2016

Christmasitis 

The physical irritation due to overstimulation caused by Christmas decorations and hearing the same Josh Groban and Michael Buble Christmas CDs over and over and over again. Usually caused by overly enthusiastic co-workers and/or spouses. Initial signs may take one to two weeks to appear after first exposure, but conditions generally increase exponentially.

Related to Christmas fatigue.

"Do you mind if I turn the radio on? They've started playing Christmas music."
"Only after we stop by the store to get some Benadryl for the Christmasitis flare up I'm about to have..."

Christmasitis by A "Valued" Customer December 2, 2016

the freds

The bowel condition resulting from the consumption of mediocre southern buffet food at chain restaurants in Florida. Conditions usually include bubble guts, mudd butt and swamp ass.

I was going to start a liquid diet cleanse this week, but this case of the freds is going to clear my poop shoot out ASAP!

the freds by A "Valued" Customer November 29, 2016