Strathcona Christian Academy 

A semi-private Christian school in Sherwood Park also known as SCA. Kids who attend SCA are often richer and more white than those at other high schools in the Park. SCA is known for being “spoiled Christian kids” where you are either popular, a band kid, a Jesus freak or a druggie. Many parents send their children to SCA with the hopes that their rebellious attitudes will change. Little do the parents know that the rebellious kids become friends with the other rebels and their behaviour only worsens. Teachers believe that every kid can change so they try not to punish them too harshly. Majority of students get a high end car for their sweet 16 including Cadillac’s, Audi’s and BMW’s. Many kids have the “in” at the school if they’re parents teach there or make sizeable donations. Often, the kids who have the in are free to do whatever they want without penalty. A small group of students attend SCA from Kindergarten to Grade 12. These students are known as “lifers” and usually run the school by the time they hit grade 10. Fort Christian students come to SCA in Grade 10 and are disliked by all SCA students. They are seen as outcasts and are typically unwelcome. By graduation, there is around 100 kids in the graduating class with approximately 1 black kid and 2 asians; the rest are white. Students spend their entire time at SCA hating their lives and complaining about how they cannot wait to leave the school only to miss it when they attend University.

Kid: where do you go to school?
SCA Kid: Strathcona Christian Academy
Kid: where?
SCA Kid: SCA...
Kid: Oh yikes, that sucks. I’m really sorry to hear that.
SCA kid: It’s not too bad! I pulled the fire alarm last week and didn’t even get detention. Plus I haven’t gone to class in a week cause my dad teaches there and the principle is my uncle.
Kid: no way that’s sick. But still... you’re at SCA. Everyone knows Facey and ABJ are better.
SCA Kid: you’re right. I want out of this hell hole.

Strathcona Christian Academy by thatsthetea123 October 31, 2019

strathcona 

An elitist organization bent on world domination. See also George Bush.

Basically, this group of people lurk around large cities. The founders were failed experiments from Area 51, and as a result, drinking acid and injecting amphetamines is daily practice. Their last known location was Calgary. News in the underground indicates that sights have been set on Edmonton.
Entrance into the organization follows rigid procedural documentation, with a double brainwash, splitting of the o-ring and gay ass haircuts.

They are characterized by common ideals of shrinking their already pitiful wangs. They are easy to spot, as each one of them has so much crud rammed up their peachholes that nostril dribbling is a common occurence. The leaders are all KKK enthusiasts, and essay writing on the effectiveness of cyanide is a regular routine.

When confronted with a strathcona member, remember to do the following...

1) Start singing ANY song of Celine Dion's. This will put the strathcona cult into a trance, as they dig this music.
2) DON'T play rochambeau with them, THEY HAVE NO BALLS. Plenty of lactate though.
3) Challenge them to anything involving sports, as they are so bent on world domination that sports is a foreign term
4) DO NOT BEND OVER. Serious anal rape will ensue, and you will be recruited for endless work in the name of George Dubya.
5) Call Chuck Norris
6) Your best option, carry a kalishkanov or some other sort of machine gun around.

Normal kid: OMFG!GTFO!!WTF!WTH!
Strathcona cult: Heeheehee! A fresh o-ring!
(Kid is mauled by gang)
Normal kid: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Member 00018293 joins cult

strathcona by H4XX0r May 11, 2006

strathcona christian academy 

chrisrian

school

gay

ass

vape
faggot

shitty ass school

strathcona christian academy- a gay ass christian school where everyone is supposed to "show love" but really they just find a way to get into the church to vape. they walk the halls changed "jesus loves you". But one specific teacher mr.camponi makes it all worse by kicking every kid he has out of his class. sca is where all the rich, privleged white kids go. SCA is a shitty ass school and everone leaves by grade 9 other that the fort christian kids.

strathcona christian academy by oh my lanta not again November 17, 2018