A Muffin is an English Gentleman who lives in Kew, in England. Muffins love to eat but usually just graze, they love chocolate tits and spend their whole lives unknowingly looking for a particular American girl. Muffins are beautiful, funny, brilliant , douchey, narcissistic, sordid, perverted and just amazing. If you come across a Muffin in your lifetime, you won't be able to pull yourself away. He is much too intoxicating, with one 'Oi,' you'll be hooked for the rest of your days. In a second he can give you the world but just as easily, break your heart. If something is wrong, he will fix it. If you are lost, he will bring you back. Muffin is the closest thing to Jesus Christ we have walking among us. If the world were Muffinless, my heart would stop beating.

Jess: I love you, Muffin.

Muffin: I know, Sweetheart.

Jess: OMG, are you fucking kidding me?!

Muffin: What's wrong, my Darling?

Jess: 'YOU KNOW'?! YOU FUCKING KNOW?! OMG, I just said that, out loud and that's it?? Do you know how hard that was?!

Muffin: I fucking love you too, Baby.
by Princess_Sparkles February 01, 2013
147 more definitions
Top Definition
A girls vagina - Many different kinds like blueberry (shaved), buttered (with cum), and many more.
Hey baby, can I butter your muffin?
by o.O April 20, 2005
One of the greatest words on the planet. This word can be used for anythin (see example)
Insult: "You Stupid muffin"
Compliment: "Hey, Nice muffins"
Self Respect: "I am the muffin king"
Insult Yourself: "I am the worlds biggest muffin"
by nobody important March 03, 2004
a delicious and fluffy treat that comes in many flavours
dutch chocolate muffin
by muffinist November 10, 2003
A really good bakery item-thing. This is probally the only definition for a edible muffin. (Don't you dare say pussy!) I like to paint muffins.
I was a muffin for Halloween, and some crazy old guy tried to eat me.
by Kirug January 05, 2005
A sympathetic name for someone.
"Aww is muffin sad?"
by Shawna December 07, 2004
A game consisting of a group of guys circle jerking onto a muffin which is located in the center of said circle jerk. Players compete by jerking their member until they ejaculate their "frosting" on the muffin. The last jerker to frost the muffin receives the pleasure of eating said muffin, along with all its frosty goodness.
Tom: I'm bored
Kyle: I have an idea! lets play muffin!!!
Grant: Absolutely!
by Corey Ellison March 04, 2008
Can be used after swear words to make them less severe. The seriousness of the explietive and the sheer niceness of the word "muffin" cancel each other out, and the recipient of the full phrase will know that the explietive is not being used entirely seriously.
You just ate the last ice cream, you complete and utter cuntmuffin!
by Tom May 01, 2005

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