Someone that hates people who masterbate or purposely blocks them from doing so by stealing their porn or not allowing them to download, buy, or view any.
When you take yourself out on dates; dating yourself. You already know what you're into, likes, dislikes, hobbies, etc... Dating yourself also allows you the freedom to have a great time, all the time, and never have to hear "you're not paying attention to me" or other forms of bitching and nagging. You are free to mingle with whom you please and are able to spend time enjoying life and being happy.
Could come off as self-centered, egotistic, or conceited to those who don't understand how hard it is to find someone as awesome as you are.
An Italian luxury car brand founded by Alfieri Maserati on December 1, 1914, in Bologna, Italy. With an easily recognizable trident as their logo, Maserati is highly revered as one of the best luxury car brands in the world.
"My Maserati does 185.
I lost my license, now I don't drive."
- Joe Walsh, "Life's Been Good"
A Maserati Problem is the kind of problem or issue that your startup company will, presumably, experience some day.
"Some day" being when you're making millions of dollars in revenue, you have 100 employees, and you're driving around in a Maserati.
Calling something a Maserati Problem, then, is akin to saying you probably shouldn't be worrying about it if your closed beta is still 2 months from launching.
Person 1: "What kind of budget do you think we should set for miscellaneous pen and pencil supplies in our supply cabinet, given that a certain number of employees will steal a given amount per month?"
Person 2: "Uh, I think that's a bit of a Maserati Problem."