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jake is a guy who can make anyone smile. his sense of humor is priceless and his blue eyes are flawless. he has perfect hair and did i mention his eyes? he yes, like everyone else has flaws but to most girls hes irresistable. the jake i know is my everything and i couldnt live without him.

dear jake,
i love youu
"jakes so perfect," kalyn said.
"yes, and hes so freaking funny," replied kendall.
by ily..(: October 22, 2013
Sexy beast, huge cock, his diet be all pussy and ass, he be fuckin every night do he be three stupid bruh
that man pulled a jake cause he just had sex with some fine ass broad
by Johnny12345678 October 09, 2013
Jamaica ginger extract, known as "Jake". During Prohibition in the United States, Jake was used as a substitute for alcohol as it contained 70-80% ethanol by weight. Due to alterations of the substance ordered by the U.S. Treasury Department, Jake users would often experience "Jake Legs", which resulted in the loss of use of the hands and feet.
"Ever since the Prohibition laws passed, I can't get my fix."
"Have you tried Jake?"
by Spiral0Architect September 22, 2013
Usually a Bandwagoner Sports fan. Jumps teams everyday. And claims to be a Life-Long Clipper Fan. Most people named Jake don't watch games but look at stats which makes it hard to talk sports with them.
All of the Heat Fans are Jake's.
by Clipper Darrel June 03, 2013
The sweetest guy you will ever meet. Cute, Handsome, and funny.
Every girls dream guy.

Jake= Cute, Funny, Amazing
That guy is such a Jake
by 애교짱 June 25, 2014
A published but then discarded Hobbit character from the Lord Of The Rings franchise, written by J R R Tolkien.

Jake was chosen first, over the character of Frodo Baggins, to be the carrier of the 'One Rind' an ancient strip of bacon rind forged long ago by the evil Jewish Necromancer "soups-on Goldstein".

Jake was quested to take the 'One Rind' to the cracks of 'Mount Pig Scrotum' where he was to cast it into the fiery sperm from once it came.

But alas Tolkien's first print was said to be "Far too Jewish for the public of it's time" and was unfortunately canned by the publishing company before it reached wide scale publication.

Only a few copy's survive of Tolkien's unread masterpiece for telling the heroic adventure of the debatable best protagonist that literature has never heard about, Jake.
Carlos - "Damn Jim I'm covered in pig sperm"

Jim - "Just like the One Rind after Jake threw it into Mount Pig Scrotum?"

Carlos - "Yeah exactly"
by Emulung January 10, 2013
A super funny, nice, sexy, athletic, goofy guy who knows how to make you laugh and be extremely romantic. Great in bed, great as a friend, the all around perfect guy.
Rachel: Woah, Annie's dating a Jake!

Jenny: Yeah, I know! I'm so jealous!
by Cassidy Brown March 08, 2012