8
I have to do this tomorrow. I'm totally fucked now. Thanks a lot, Mrs. smoking pot Dunn-Peters for not teaching me about essays.
by suicidalqueen January 31, 2011
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9
How a moron spells ese.
An essay is something you write for school, not a Mexican.
by WAGMIRE October 14, 2005
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10
a waste of time that MLA and APA supporters believe is not colossal enough in its time-wasting ability. used by professors whose sole dream it is to stop students from slacking off for the weekend. goes well with coffee.
I can't believe Mr. Smith just gave us that huge fucking essay! He's out of his mind.

Jimmy, you can't go to the senior prom until you finish writing that essay.
by B-e-n February 12, 2006
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11
1. What you should probably be working on right now. See also: homework
Hmm, what can I possibly do to further my procrastination? I know! Look up the word "essay" on UD!
by Henriettah June 14, 2011
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12
1. A composition that is usually a few pages long.
2. Something that evil English teachers assign too many of.
I have to write another English essay today.
by 5'11"Racer December 19, 2006
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13
An impossibly difficult written task set by extremely evil, cruel, and nasty teachers (or teachers' bosses - some teachers don't like essays either!) to do for homework,usually due for a week after they are set.
Essays are possibly the worst torture ever due to their immense difficulty to accomplish for a certain young goldfish who may or may not be writing this definition when they are supposed to be doing their Citizenship essay on bullying that is already 15 days overdue!

and I can't do it! Help me!!!!! :-(
by Goldfish United! February 26, 2009
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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14
An essay is a long-winded response sent via text message. These long responses characteristically come from people who express interest in a text message conversation, although this interest is in some cases overzealous.
When you have to use four messages to fit everything into your text, you are writing an essay.
by textking June 18, 2009
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