Beachmaster 

The king hippopotamus. He runs the beach. The other hippos can't even go to sleep until Beachmaster does first. Now and then a younger hippo will challenge Beachmaster to a fight. If the challenger wins he becomes the new Beachmaster. However Beachmaster always wins. After victory Beachmaster will fornicate with a woman of his choosing. His favorite pastime is eating sausages from the sausage tree, which blossoms once a year. He is also very protective of his fellow hippos. When a hippo dies, Beachmaster will protect the corpse from hyennas, lions, crocodiles, or whatever. However if he's hungry he will eat it himself. The bottom line is that Beachmaster is the shit.

Beachmaster killed Johnny after he lied down first.

Beachmaster by Wifflemaster July 16, 2008

Beachwrite 

A person who doodles in the sand.

Someone who writes names/words and phrases in the sand, captures the image on digital media, preserving the moment forever before it is washed away to sea. Aka Beachwriting, Beachwriters, Beachwrite or Doodlers of Nature.

Beachwrite by Beachwrite September 14, 2011

Beachwalker 

Is the a name for someone who is holding out on having sex as they want to be in a serious relationship. Similar to celibacy but incorrect as marriage isn't necessary. Doesn't mean you are not interested in having sex.

"Yeah dude she's all over me but she just won't have sax with me, no matter how romantic the dates are"
"Sounds like a beachwalker"

Beachwalker by UrbanOxford December 11, 2016

beachbasker

A beachbasker — or basker for short — is someone who beachbasks: floating, lounging, or basking on a board at the beach without trying to surf.

“I’m not a surfer. I’m a basker who loves being immersed in Mother Nature.”

“Surfers catch waves. Beachbaskers touch the surface.”

“He brought a baskboard to the beach and spent the afternoon beachbasking.”

beachbasker by Mondellera May 30, 2026