Bagel

A big zero. Someone who doesn't bring anything to the table.

kevin: let's go out tonight!
joey: nah, bro, i'm gonna stay in and play video games/
kevin: wow, stop being a bagel!

by alumsquad August 29, 2011

bagels

code word for marijuana

person 1 - "Hey are we still going to eat bagels after school?"
person 2 - "Yeah i have so many. We are going to be so full!"

by Kobie Bananas March 19, 2010

Bagel

This is the most important thing in all of existence. The bagel is love, life, and tan. It's also the shape of the universe, or something. I really have no fucking idea. It's important tho

"Bagel."

by Him Fromireland July 17, 2017

Bagel

The superior "on-the-go" breakfast food. Works well accompanied with cream cheese, butter, jam, pretty much anything that you can spread with a knife.

Bagels; A short story.

I like bagels
They like me
Bagels are good
If you don't like bagels

whydontyoulikebagels
Bagels
Bagels
Bagels

-Smitty McBagelstorm, 1891.2

by CharlesJJJ November 4, 2016

bagel

bagel (n) Holy food of the Jews.

Generic Rabbi: Ya call that a bagel? Sclomcka!

by chuffy_mcflannelslap October 13, 2004

Bageling

The act of pelting a bagel at someone from a moving vehicle. Cinnamon-rasin bagels recommended. It is also recommended to have a fast car and a capable driver, just in case people don't like being hit with flying pastries. Face shots are the goal. Chest and back shots are acceptable.

Let's go bageling on Tuesday!

Roberto:"I have all of these bagels in my car, but I don't know what to do with them..."
Conrad:"We could eat them?"
Bruce:"Or we could go bageling!"

by bagel wizard December 31, 2013

bagel

A really old doughnut

Next time you ask for a "shmear" on that bagel, you should ask for sprinkles too. Why? A "hole" lot of cheating at the Kwik-E-Mart, that's why. Turns out that Apu is selling chewy week-old donuts -- from the bagel bin! Is nothing sacred? In this reporter's opinion, no.

by Homer Simpson December 27, 2005