Zelch

A penis that is so hard that when you hit it with a hammer, the hammer breaks.
When Stu first saw Farrah Fawcett's poster, he grew a zelch.

I was awakened in the middle of the night by a painful Zelch
by Guntherthepriest June 30, 2009
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Zelch

A penis that is so hard that when you hit it with a hammer, the hammer breaks.
When Chad saw Paul P. in the cafeteria, he had an instant zelch.
by billsfan2 August 27, 2010
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Adam zelch

A scruffy ugly smelly cunt who can't afford a hair cut
Erghh look at that smelly spastic Adam zelch
by Dburn3 July 12, 2016
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Zelching

When you lick 10 zyns and place them on your dick, and have someone give you a blowjob.
Josh: Yo you remember that girl i picked up last friday, she gave me a nasty zelching
Jake: What flavor were the zyns dawg
by barbecue jim beams March 30, 2024
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Zelching

When you lick 10 zyns and place them on your dick, and have someone give you a blowjob.
Josh: Yo you remember that girl i picked up last friday, she was zelching me all night long
Jake: What flavor were the zyns dawg
by barbecue jim beams March 30, 2024
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Zelching

Doing fuck all
Nursing a phat hangover, been zelching all day
Katy law 2020
by Zelcher February 22, 2020
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ZELCHING

zelching is when a bunch of homosexual sn0gang members collectively drain each other with buttplugs, anal beeds, dildos, etc. the action also need to have any novagang song playing in the background.
person 1 "hey man are you down for zelching tonight?"
person 2 "fuck no miss me with that gay shit pussy"
by god save us March 24, 2024
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