Zelch

A penis that is so hard that when you hit it with a hammer, the hammer breaks.

When Stu first saw Farrah Fawcett's poster, he grew a zelch.

I was awakened in the middle of the night by a painful Zelch

by Guntherthepriest June 29, 2009

Zelch

A penis that is so hard that when you hit it with a hammer, the hammer breaks.

When Chad saw Paul P. in the cafeteria, he had an instant zelch.

by billsfan2 August 27, 2010

Adam zelch

A scruffy ugly smelly cunt who can't afford a hair cut

Erghh look at that smelly spastic Adam zelch

by Dburn3 July 12, 2016

ZELCHING

zelching is when a bunch of homosexual sn0gang members collectively drain each other with buttplugs, anal beeds, dildos, etc. the action also need to have any novagang song playing in the background.

person 1 "hey man are you down for zelching tonight?"
person 2 "fuck no miss me with that gay shit pussy"

by god save us March 23, 2024

zelched

What you are after smoking a fat blunt.

Man, i took one hit of that chronic and i was zelched!

by YESSSSSSSSS May 20, 2007

Zelching

Doing fuck all

Nursing a phat hangover, been zelching all day
Katy law 2020

by Zelcher February 21, 2020

Zelching

When you put your girls toes in your mouth and swing her in a circle while jacking off. Any girl who would want this is definitely not the girl you want to do anything with.

“Dude she let me pull a Zelching on her!”
“How much did she cost?”

by Not Ashton Molloy May 1, 2024