Top Definition
Derived from the T.V show 'How I met your mother', to Ted is to be morbidly depressed about your social or love life. People who ted often; over think situations, have low confidence in their appeal to the opposite sex and often refer to attractive members of the opposite sex as 'out of their league'. People who Ted on a regular basis tend to be unimpulsive and require a great deal of peer pressure to engage with the opposite sex.
Guy 1: "So did you talk to Charissa last night?"
Guy 2: "Yeah, but I don't think she'd ever go for a guy like me."
Guy 1: "Stop tedding man."
by Moing It November 10, 2011
Tedding: the male act of monetary pretension as a means to get in your pants, someday; carrot-danglers with perverse intentions.

Teds take you to "nice" dinners at the Capital Grille and promise you nice things like Prada handbags, Christian Louboutins and someday a trip to Paris. At first you are really excited at the thought of being wined, dined and spoiled because your 45,000 annual salary is barely enough to dine at Applebees and pay for your studio apartment.

However, when it comes time to deliver the goods, something always seems to come up...

Ted- "My great uncle died, I have to go out of town for the weekend. Sorry, we will go shopping when I get back..."

Ted-"Ugh, I spent 30 grand in Vegas this weekend." *hint, hint*

Warning Signs of a Ted:

-The rug in his bathroom is from Target.

-After a few well vodka tonics, he brags about his 1 million Marriot points and United Gold status, as a discrete but insincere gesture that he intends on taking you on a "vacation."

-He drives an Acura.

-You find a receipt for Men's Warehouse in his car cup holder.

-He is a software developer.

-He buys you a perfume sampler from Sephora.

Teds come in all shapes and sizes, but generally speaking they are 4's or 5's at best and a 10 on the scale of disappointment.
Ashley: "Chris and I went to South Beach this weekend -- I got a Prada Saffiano and a pair of Christian Pigalles."

You: Are you fricking Tedding me!?

Ashley - "No."
by Lindseeeb March 12, 2014

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