1 definition by Trialacrobat308

Ted is a criminal dating back to before Christ. If you see Ted call the police or run. Teds criminal record is stated below

DOB:1972-02-07

Race:Lizard

Sex:Please
Eyes:Brown
Height:7 ft 11 in

Hair:None
Weight:14 tons.
Offense or Statute
Offense/Statute:Rape-1st:forcible CompulsionDate Convicted:12 April 1993, 1 March 2022, 1 January 19 BC, 28 February 1442

Offense/Statute:Sexual Abuse 1st Degree:contact By Forcible CompulsionDate

Convicted:1 January 19 BC, 28 February 1442

Offense/Statute:Sodomy:intercourse Forcible CompulsionDate

Convicted: 1 March 2022

Offense/Statute:Unlawful Imprisonment-1st DegreeDate

Convicted:1 January 19 BC, 28 February 1442

Offense/Statute:Rape-1st:forcible CompulsionDate

Convicted:12 April 1993

Offense/Statute:Sexual Abuse 1st Degree:contact By Forcible CompulsionDate

Convicted:12 April 1993

Offense/Statute:Sodomy:intercourse Forcible CompulsionDate

Convicted:12 April 1993

Offense/Statute:Unlawful Imprisonment-1st DegreeDate

Convicted:12 April 1993
Oh god did you hear about Mia.
No, what happened.

She’s keeping Ted Ted as a pet.
Oh god.
by Trialacrobat308 April 6, 2022
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