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Insultant 

One who is educated in treating or speaking with contemptuous rudeness and obvious arrogance and paid for this service
Insultant: "You are a spineless, heap of flaming dog poo and you are not worth the paper i wipe my ass with."

Boss: "Who are you and why are you telling me this?!"

Insultant: "I'm Joe's insultant, here's my card and referrals are appreciated."
Insultant by TheInsultant November 19, 2011

Swiss Miss Instant Piss

When you don't check the serving size while preparing your Swiss Miss Instant Chocolate.

According to Sam O'nella the chocolate tastes like piss. So you unleash a primal roar of sheer fury, the cat shits itself and jumps out the window as you kick the Swiss Miss box across the room.
-You take a sip and it tastes like piss, Swiss Miss Instant Piss.

Instant Forbes

A term used to describe a jackpot of a specified lottery to be over a billion dollars. Hence, the winner of the jackpot will win a billion dollars or more, meaning that they will be added to the Forbes Billionaires List. In a nutshell, their name will instantly be put on Forbes.
"Hey, did you hear that the jackpot is over 1.4 billion dollars today?"

"You bet! That is like Instant Forbes right there!"
Instant Forbes by VMECK July 30, 2016

The Instant Hagrid 

Applying superglue to your face before going down on some hairy gash, once removed there lie a glorious beard.
She had such poor personal upkeep that I gave her The Instant Hagrid

I was so appreciative that she didn't shave, because I could achieve The Instant Hagrid

Instant Blowie 

When you perform an action or say something that causes those around you to compulsively perform oral sex upon you.
Dude 1: Hey I just won that League of Legends tournament.
Dude 2: Woah bro that's sick.
Dude 1: Yeah bro, I got an instant blowie too.
Instant Blowie by BigFloppa December 19, 2020

insultainment 

print, broadcast or online content, especially that distributed by a commercial entity, which is so stultifyingly stupid and/or devoid of actual news or information that it can only be considered an insult to the intelligence of (and may even induce fits of rage in) the viewer.
i told my dad he needs to start watching something other than the o'reilly factor. all that insultainment's no good for his blood pressure!
insultainment by aarrgghh January 1, 2008