Old Brit term for parking yourself at a bar, the reference implying that you and your pub-mates become decorations on the bar, which are often built with a slab of mahogany wood.
A move during an argument or discussion whereby a person (almost always a woman) has absolutely no comeback and knows in a fair fight they're beaten, forcing them into a totally nonsensical, unrelated Hail Mary response. This strategy occurs when the person (almost always a woman) either realizes the other person is right and it's best to try to throw them off or when they're simply an idiot.
Fred calmly explained to his wife Mandy that her continued credit card expenditures at high end department stores would likely threaten the family's ability to pay their bills, and definitely end any chance of sending their children to college. Mandy, calling on the crown jewel of Desperation Debating replied, "Yeah? Well you have a small dick!
An alternative and discreet way of referring to a load filled, gizz covered sex party or gang bang or orgy or a bukkake when you do not wish to let it be known of your involvement in such taboo activities.
Mom: Son, where are you going tonight? You need to behave and be back on time.
Son: No worries Mom. I am going to a Decorating Party for the holidays.
Mom: How sweet. You are such a good boy!
"Here Dave, sounds like Big Bazza's been decorating No.10 again. His daughter gave him four grand to settle his tax bill yesterday morning but I'm sure I saw him roll up to the pub in a new motor last night"