The chocolate factory (as in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) of the law profession, where desperate attorneys work for a pittance, like Oompa Loompas working for cacao beans. Except in Insurance Defense, the attorneys don't smile and sing happy songs.
I went to a ttt, and now I do insurance defense. In a sad and cruel twist of fate, I can't even afford the insurance rates of my own clients, so my teeth are rotting away, and the pinched nerve in my groin is making me incontinent.
by Sir Humps a Lot February 5, 2007
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When asked about a jizz stain left on a sofa, t-shirt, towel, etc. one will often use the toothpaste defense
To avoid embarrassment, Danny used the toothpaste defense when his mother inquired about the sticky white stains all over his laundry.

Mom: Danny, I've been going through your laundry, and I've discovered a multitude of sticky white stains on almost all your clothes
Danny: It's just toothpaste, ma.

Wise teen: I used the toothpaste defense once, but after that I started doing my own laundry
by hombretropical July 30, 2012
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popular method of thwarting muggers. Patented by self defense instructor Brett Kaywood and has proved to be effective in the only laboaratory that matters: The streets. When confronted by a mugger, the method consists of 2 simple steps:

1) Gain wrist control

2) Pull out your gun

This technique can be used in many situations such as:

- You're walking home from work when a mugger confronts you in a back alleyway because he wants crack.

- Your best friend mugs you at his barbacue because he wants your money to buy crack.

- Your mugger is sleeping in their own bed (remember to climb in through the window) and is mugging you for crack.

- Your mugger is bound by the wrists in the trunk of your car and he is mugging you because he needs crack.

Person 1: I heard it was your grandma's 100th birthday today. How did that go?

Person 2: She tried mugging me to buy crack so I used what I learned from Self Defense and pulled out my gun.
by eclipseballer603 December 2, 2008
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After a friend takes embarassing photos of you (likely involving alcohol-induced activities), staying logged into facebook awaiting aforementioned "friend" to tag said photos of you, allowing you to quickly de-tag them before the rest of the world finds out.
I spent all day sunday playing facebook defense against the photo documentation of last night's debauchery.
by Bignatius December 15, 2008
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The act in which a man defends himself when his woman is being a nagging pain in the ass.

The act of defending oneself against claims of nagging, which leads a man to become an asshole.
Since my girlfriend picks me apart, I have turned to defensive assholing to make my point.
by assholer1 February 18, 2010
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Taking necessary precautions and doing as much as you can not to anger actives and avoid getting fucked in the ass by them and get hazed while pledging a fraternity.
Pledge #1: Shit, I didn't get all the tasks done for this week.

Pledge #2: Haha, you're fucked. Be smart and follow defensive pledging. I got my shit done a while ago, so now I can laugh at you while you eat dirt doing pushups tonight.
by Tralalalala January 13, 2008
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Deflector Defense- when one cannot provide a good reason for not participating in an activity that they have to turn it around and deflect blame where it does not belong. This is generally done in effort to move the attention away from the issue at hand and put it on someone else.

"Stephanie is putting up her deflector defense again to avoid why she will really not attend Girls Night Out".

"Uh oh, here comes Stephanie's deflector defense again. Let's be prepared Kathy!"

"Stephanie always uses a deflector defense when she has lame excuses for not doing something."
by KLee123 March 20, 2009
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