Pastard 

An adaptation of the word "Bastard" to be used solely in a context where pastries or sweets are involved, generally towards an individual that has had something to eat that you haven't.

Giulia brought her own pastries at work today and didn't share, what a royal pastard.

Pastard by Mysteryfox September 30, 2016

Pastard 

1. A Pastor that is a Bastard. i.e. PASTARD.

2. Any pastor that tries too hard, is too young or goes door to door trying to convince you that there's an invisible man in the sky that talks to him.

3. All pastors, ministers, preachers, religious solicitors, clergy, people of the 'cloth' and deacons. (and anyone who got an online clergy card and uses it)

Bill: "That church dude really needs to cut his hair. He's a real pastard."

Jesus: "Yeah, it's freaking me out, dude."

Bill: "Woah! Where are your sandals?"

Jesus: "LOL, I think that pastard stole them!"

Pastard by NoSandal January 18, 2011

Pastard 

It is said of a certain kind of flatmate that, when it comes to cooking, always resorts to the same old, readymade and frustratingly uninspiring pasta dish.

Flatmate 1: Ohh, tonight Rob's making dinner! I'm sure he won't let us down. He really has a gift for cooking.

Flatmate 2: Are you joking?? He's a f*cking pastard!! He always prepares the same bolognese spaghetti using the cheapest pesto sauce in the supermarket!

Pastard by A Cracovian flatmate April 21, 2011

Pastard 

A scumbag who brings up negatives from your past to pull you down or belittle you.

Note: Ben has nothing against gays

Bill: (argument)

Ben: (counter-argument)

Bill: at least I didn't fuck a guy!

Ben: but, that was ages ago.

Bill: you still did it.

Ben: sure you hang out with gay guys.

Bill: I don't fuck them though.

Ben: you just can't accept my argument, pastard... >.<

Pastard by Alien0826 April 25, 2013

Pastard 

{pɑːstɜː(ɹ)d}; Noun. (past + bastard)

1. A retroactive insult for a person who was a bastard in history.

2. An insult towards time-travellers who currently reside in the past.

"Wait, so that T-800 we sent to destroy humanity was turned to the human side, sent back in time and saved Jon Connor from our newest time-traveling robot assassin? What a pastard."

Pastard by EthZee March 8, 2010

Pastard 

An overly preachy asshole

"I'm better than you!"
"Man that guy is a pastard"

Pastard by Half-Blood Prick April 25, 2015

Pastard 

An old or lost friend that abruptly ended the friendship or relationship out of anger or guilt.

Vince is a pastard, he told me he hated me because his girl likes me.

Pastard by Knowone hear August 1, 2018