simon's definitions

Toilet Trout

A close cousin of the Stray Dave with all the staying power but none of the bouyancy. a Toilet Trout sits on the bottom of the pan developing am orangey-brown "halo"
Can sometimes be shifted by "Tout Tickling" - urinating at high pressure to break the trout down into flushable pieces

that toilet trout must've been there ages, look at the size of the halo!!

by Simon January 19, 2004

knob

the male organ, penis.

Lady: "excuse me sir, your knob is sticking out."
Man: "don't flatter yourself woman. its hanging out."
Man 2: "call that a knob?"

by simon December 24, 2003

assassassin

noun. a regular assassin who is specifically focused on the ass or anal vicinity. Perhaps his targets all have abnormally large asses, perhaps he uses with a weapon in that area. Finally, there could be a hint of anal sex involved.

He's so fat no normal assassin will do, only an assassassin can reach the gooey center.

by Simon November 16, 2004

Gay Station 2

Best. Name. Ever.

Play Station 2? More like GAY Station 2!

by Simon October 14, 2003

Mookie

monkey like, abnormal agility and facial expressions. he makes squawking noises and can eat an apple faster than any living mook. don't confuse this creature with Chris Kattan, though very similar in stature, they aren't the same person. will eat 6 of any pill, anytime.

mookie L, quit jumping around like a monkey and design me a city.

by simon July 3, 2003

schoolyard

1. A psychological condition characterized by a vigilant, sanctimonious, and solicitous predilection.
2. Rigorous in religious observance; marked by stern morality.

She's a schoolyard mother!

by Simon March 16, 2004

git mae hole

(Glaswegian slang) evocative expression used in lieu of other more widely-used and less descriptive terms for making love while very, very drunk.

"Ah wuz oot tae git mae hole but ah ended up takin' a whitie and boakin' doon 'er skirt, man."

by simon January 21, 2004