1) Extremely painful shit. A very painful dump. A long and painful act on the toilette. Generally caused by lack of fibre and waiting too long to shit. A shit which may require assistance, either medically, or with a rigid spoon-like excavation tool.
2) A term used amongst well known friends, and best not used just anywhere.
2) A term used amongst well known friends, and best not used just anywhere.
1) Scott: "What took you so long in my washroom guy, there aren't any magazines in there when you come over!"
Max: "Duuuude, I couldn't go, I was squirming and standing on my fucking toes squeezing and writhing in agony. It was like I was giving a shit birth. I had a serious ass ripper!!"
Scott: "AW fuck man, not again, I had to replace my toilette last time you used it!!!! Why don't you just go straight to the fucking sewage plant guy and hang over the septic pool before you come to visit!!"
2) Best not used location example-
Max: "I would like to toast the bride whom I have had some special moments with before today - especially last night - I digress, firstly I would like to apologize for my scratchy throat, I spent the last 5 minutes screaming in the can forcing out an extreme ass ripper!"
Max: "Duuuude, I couldn't go, I was squirming and standing on my fucking toes squeezing and writhing in agony. It was like I was giving a shit birth. I had a serious ass ripper!!"
Scott: "AW fuck man, not again, I had to replace my toilette last time you used it!!!! Why don't you just go straight to the fucking sewage plant guy and hang over the septic pool before you come to visit!!"
2) Best not used location example-
Max: "I would like to toast the bride whom I have had some special moments with before today - especially last night - I digress, firstly I would like to apologize for my scratchy throat, I spent the last 5 minutes screaming in the can forcing out an extreme ass ripper!"
by psiscott April 10, 2006
A hermaphrodite. A humanish unit that has a cock and a pussy. May sound fun but not when you are trying to find a mate that wants a serious relationship! A layman's term for such an error of biology. Usually used to describe what looks like a woman but is actually...well...a he-she!
he she or he/she or he-she
Max: "Remember that chick I took outa the bar last night."
Scott: "Yea...I remember, I set you up with her" - laughing
Max: "Well, I get her home and I am sucking her tits, licking her tonsils, she's going wild..starts bobbing my Kong, I blow and reach for her pie...gonna do some carpet-munching....But she had a fucking Cock AND a snatch. I was so drunk, I almost pushed the cock aside to get some quim but nearly puked when I smelled it...nasty..nasty...nasty."
Scott: "No shit dude, so you had your first experience with a he-she you man-slut!"
Max: "Remember that chick I took outa the bar last night."
Scott: "Yea...I remember, I set you up with her" - laughing
Max: "Well, I get her home and I am sucking her tits, licking her tonsils, she's going wild..starts bobbing my Kong, I blow and reach for her pie...gonna do some carpet-munching....But she had a fucking Cock AND a snatch. I was so drunk, I almost pushed the cock aside to get some quim but nearly puked when I smelled it...nasty..nasty...nasty."
Scott: "No shit dude, so you had your first experience with a he-she you man-slut!"
by psiscott April 09, 2006
A total idiot, a lost cause, a moron's mentor! A guy that could make you stupid just talking with him for 2 minutes.
As you watch a guy across the street trying to get a paper out of the newspaper box - while holding his coffee - he fumbles for a second, goes to put his coffee down and misses the side of the box, it spills on a passing woman dressed in pure white, as he tries hopelessly to save the coffee, the box suddenly comes open and quickly slams shut on his nuts. He yells in pain and shock....you slowly shake your head in disbelief and say: "What a dwanker!"
by psiscott April 09, 2006
NOT 1001 Knights. This has nothing to do with chivalry per se but a length of time; hence 'nights.'
The Book of One Thousand and One Nights - also known as The Book of a Thousand Nights and a Night, One Thousand and One Nights, 1001 Arabian Nights, Arabian Nights, The Nightly Entertainments or simply The Nights - is a medieval Middle-Eastern literary epic which tells the story of Scheherazade, a Sassanid Queen, who must relate a series of stories to her malevolent husband, the King, to delay her execution. The stories are told over a period of one thousand and one nights, and every night she ends the story with a suspenseful situation, forcing the King to keep her alive for another day. The individual stories were created over many centuries, by many people and in many styles, and they have become famous in their own right. Notable examples include Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves and The Seven Voyages of Sinbad the Sailor.
The Book of One Thousand and One Nights - also known as The Book of a Thousand Nights and a Night, One Thousand and One Nights, 1001 Arabian Nights, Arabian Nights, The Nightly Entertainments or simply The Nights - is a medieval Middle-Eastern literary epic which tells the story of Scheherazade, a Sassanid Queen, who must relate a series of stories to her malevolent husband, the King, to delay her execution. The stories are told over a period of one thousand and one nights, and every night she ends the story with a suspenseful situation, forcing the King to keep her alive for another day. The individual stories were created over many centuries, by many people and in many styles, and they have become famous in their own right. Notable examples include Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves and The Seven Voyages of Sinbad the Sailor.
Mitch: -- in a wannabe, I am a lit sophomore manner -- "If this continues we are going to have to call in the 1001 knights; to quote the title of a book."
Scott: "Wrong again guy; it is '1001 nights' as in 'the evening.' This is not a reference to guys in armour on the backs of horses!"
Scott: "Wrong again guy; it is '1001 nights' as in 'the evening.' This is not a reference to guys in armour on the backs of horses!"
by psiscott April 21, 2006
An adjective used to describe how a woman looks in her attire. A reference to the supposition that a woman has a very juicy - or well lubricated - vagina and would be an extremely thrilling sexual partner.
Noel: "Look at the way Heather's shorts are being vaginally consumed."
Scott: "No fucking kidding. She looks SOooooo gooey!"
Scott: "No fucking kidding. She looks SOooooo gooey!"
by psiscott April 10, 2006
by psiscott April 10, 2006
A term used to describe how badly someone is shaking either from the DTs or nerves or while attempting to do something small and detailed like threading the eye of a needle.
Described thus in reference to when a dog takes a dump, it often shakes its hind-end or whole body during the task. If it were razor blades being defacated, then the shaking would likely be infinitely more pronounced!
Described thus in reference to when a dog takes a dump, it often shakes its hind-end or whole body during the task. If it were razor blades being defacated, then the shaking would likely be infinitely more pronounced!
Scott: *trying to put a nut on a bolt wedged way up inside the frame of his car* "I can't...quite...get the mother...shit, I just had it...FUCK...I can't get it, my arm is going numb!!!"
Max: *watching Scott fumble and shake as his arm becomes spaghetti from the tedious task* "Dude, your shaking like a dog shitting razor blades."
Max: *watching Scott fumble and shake as his arm becomes spaghetti from the tedious task* "Dude, your shaking like a dog shitting razor blades."
by psiscott April 11, 2006