archyis's definitions

Chickenhawk Engineer

A person works in the engineering field who discusses and debates the best way method to perform a given task, but then consciously avoids doing the actual work themselves.

"It is quite amusing how Mark got so heated in the arguement about how to architect that widget but then the next day he avoids actually performing the very tasks that he was describing" said Frank.

Max replies, "That is because he is a Chickenhawk Engineer. He will always get in arguements about how to solve a problem, but never gets involved in the actual work of implementing the solution."

by archyis February 17, 2009

Technology Budget Filibuster

The business tactic of stalling and forcing technology engineers to provide redundant documentation and plans in the hopes of dragging the project out so it will not have to be funded despite already being approved.

"Could you please provide a more detailed project plan" asked Freddy

"How much more detailed can it get? Are you are not pulling a technology budget filibuster on me?" responded Richard

"You caught me Ralph...they are trying not to fund this project this year even though it was approved" admitted Freddy.

by archyis July 7, 2009

Chelephant

The hybrid beast that is created by cross breeding a chimp with an elephant.

Newscaster - "Now here we see the New Zealand native Chelephant which is a sad animal...for it has the ability to climb trees but tragically no tree can support it's weight"

by archyis January 14, 2010

Put it in the cloud

A generic and naive response to a technology problem which effectively takes the problem out of the realm of an organization's responsibility. This basically equates to outsourcing technology solutions which end up being inferior service for twice the cost.

Engineer - "We need $10,000 and another full time employee to re-engineer and manage this technology"
CIO - "We should just put it in the cloud"
Engineer - "What cloud?"
CIO - Looks around nervously..."The one there..." as he points to a picture of a cloud on the cover of his new CIO magazine.
Engineer - Returns to his cube where he promptly hangs himself with an ethernet cable.

by archyis August 28, 2009

Fiveshadowing

Blatently obvious foreshadowing which commonly occurs within poorly written horror movies.

Man - "Hah, they just showed a guy working with a wood chipper. You know some fool is going to end up getting his ass chipped to death. This is classic fiveshadowing."

Woman - "Oh yeah...you know someone is going to get Fargo'd now"

by archyis January 2, 2010

Flumonia

The synergistic "Super-bug" that is spawned when an individual becomes infected with the influenza and pnemonia at the same time. This is more sinister than the dreaded bird and/or swine flu...and is more on-par with the fabled SuperFlu from the movie "The Stand".

Monday
Patient - Yo, I don't feel so good doc.
Doctor - Well I declare...you must have a case of the flu.

Thursday
Patient - Yo, I feel worse now doc.
Doctor - For Pete's sake, it appears you now have pnemonia.
Patient - Does that mean I have Flumonia?

by archyis October 8, 2009

Con Bus

A satiric description (based off the movie Con Air) of a public transit bus that seems to be composed solely of convicted felons, drunks, druggies and possibly killers.

"Dude, I caught the Con Bus home after the gym the other day. Half the people were drunk and the other half seemed to be going to a methadone clinic and were talking about beating people up." said Jimmy Ray. "I was scared for my life but you can't show weakness on the Con Bus or you could get rolled"

by archyis March 21, 2009