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al-in-chgo's definitions

Suck On My Cock

"Suck On My Cock" is a satirical Christmas send-up, lyrics written by Pacific Northwest shock jock and prolific parodist Bob Rivers and based on the tune of the bestselling "Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms (1957).

With himself as singer, "Suck On My Cock" was released as part of a Rivers Christmastime satiric CD, and in 2007 as part of Rivers' CD "Rated X Max." Rivers' lyrics graphically recount in first-person the experience of receiving a full and complete act of fellatio by his (possibly) unwilling partner and makes ample use of "Jingle Bell Rock's" tune, multiple stanzas, choruses and chord changes.

The song is offensive, obscene, and politically incorrect but very funny to those who like no-holds-barred satire. It has been covered often in the ensuing years by Matt Rogers and other singers. Downloadable sung versions and lyrics are not difficult to find on the Internet, though good copies of the prior CD releases command a huge premium in the online used-disc market.

If live versions are included, it is hard to measure how high "Suck On My Cock" ranks in Rivers' ample songbook, but it appears to be shaping up as a "guilty" Christmas pleasure along with many of his other Yuletide parodies, such as "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" and "Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire."

Bob Rivers asserts that he still owns copyright to the lyrics.
.
-- "God, I couldn't believe it when the band began to play "Jingle Bell Rock" and the singer started off with 'Stroke on my, lick on my, suck on my cock..."

-- "Yeah, hardcore! But it was pretty late and I don't think people minded "blue" material. Hope you listened up, 'cuz I bet the band won't play it for another 364 days."

-- "Yeah OK, fool, but cyberspace never forgets."

.
by al-in-chgo October 30, 2010
mugGet the Suck On My Cockmug.

Broken Nose

The late Chicago journalist and author Mike Royko (BOSS) said that loving Chicago was like loving a beautiful woman with a broken nose: once you're used to her, other merely beautiful women don't quite look right.
Some of the "broken noses" of Chicago:

1. North Side pro baseball team, the Cubs, who perpetuate an execrable win/losss record but are nonetheless idolized as the "cubbies";

2. Weather: coldest major American city other than Minneapolis, snowiest outside Buffalo, steamiest summers outside the Mississippi River Valley or Deep South. Winter days are so short that evening rush occurs in the dark. Even on the best spring days, "San Francisco sweater weather" is practically nonexistent.

3. Political corruption, which is awesome due to its extent, its reach, its resourcesfulness and the apathy with which it is greated by most Chicagoans.

more pleasant phenomena of Chicago that still have a slight eccentric or "broken nose" quality:

1. Italian beef, which is roast been marinated in gravy, garlic and giardinera, served on Italian-crust sandwich bread, and almost unobtainable outside Chicago.

2. the conviction (and it still actually works) that if you place old dinette chairs in the spot from which you just extricated your hitherto snowbound car, that spot will be waiting for you when you get back.

3. Refusal to call the 'Willis Tower' anything other than its original name, the 'Sears Tower.'

"Is this a great city or what"?
by al-in-chgo January 2, 2011
mugGet the Broken Nosemug.

GLIBERTARIAN

(Sometimes "Glibbertarian") From GLIB + libERTARIAN. A well-off or self-made individual who offers easy nostrums for complicated social and economic problems, usually centered around such premises as "A government program never helped anyone," or "Government is the cause of, not the answer to, America's problems."

A glibertarian response is frequently preceded by "Oh, just let this happen" or "Oh, all we need to do is . . . " Sometimes these statements elucidate libertarian principles, if a bit superficially, but more often invoke knee-jerk responses that offer snappy, painless solutions from anything but government.
"We have to get manufacturing back into this country."

"Oh, just let the magic of the market take care of that."

"What are we to do about illegal immigration?"

"Oh, all we need to do is get these folks onto a market-driven salary and off all these government programs like public schools and health care."

sarcastically: "Where on earth did you get all these wonderful solutions?"

"Oh, I'm a self-made man."

Original speaker sotto voce "A Glibertarian worships his own maker."
by al-in-chgo March 18, 2011
mugGet the GLIBERTARIANmug.

doxxing

Doxxing, by way of "name-dropping," is document (doxx) dropping. It's publicly exposing someone's real name or address on the Internet who has taken pains to keep them secret. Also spelled "doxing."
"She calls herself 'Connie from Fat City' but someone outed her real identity and location as Karen last name from Palo Alto,' even giving street address, and put it all over the web."

"I hate that kind of doxxing. It's mean."
by al-in-chgo April 25, 2014
mugGet the doxxingmug.

Stroke Book

Slang for an erotic magazine, frequently a well-distributed glossy monthly, generally featuring soft-core pornography in the form of nude pictorials ("photo spreads") and short fiction.

The "stroke" in "Stroke Book" is the frequent use of such periodicals to achieve sexual fantasy, arousal, and usually solo sex, that is, manual stimulation or masturbation to orgasm on the reader's part. The focus of such magazines is usually to highlight nudes of one specific gender in the pictorials, not both, and the perspective of one gender as narrator of a graphic erotic encounter in the short fiction.
.

"Hey, Sis, can I borrow your copy of nudie magazine? I need a stroke book, if you know what I mean."

--
"Okay, Leslie, but bring it back afterwards and don't get the pages stuck together!"
by al-in-chgo February 22, 2010
mugGet the Stroke Bookmug.

Ass Mode

A term consistently used during the lead-in to the "Twitters, Tweets and E-Mail" section of Craig Ferguson's "Late Late Night Show" on CBS.

May refer to the practice of setting a cell phone to "ring" not with sound but with vibration. Worn on the fanny (or inside a fanny pack), such a phone would be communicating an inbound call in "Ass Mode."
"Stop squirming."

"Can't help it. I'm in (or: 'The phone is in') Ass Mode."
by al-in-chgo February 25, 2011
mugGet the Ass Modemug.

knob slobber

1. A euphemism combined with a metaphor: Knob: euphemism for dick head, penis (cf. "get my knob polished"). Slobber: visible pre-cum (pre-ejaculate fluid) emanating from the penis, so called because the fluid is clear and visually resembles drool or spittle.

2. By extension, knob slobber can also mean a dick head bearing visible saliva (spittle) from fellatio, together with pre-ejaculate. The combination of the two is also clear.

A related term is knob slob, a giver of messy blowjobs.
--"Timm pre-cums so much his knob slobber looks like a deluge."
by al-in-chgo June 16, 2011
mugGet the knob slobbermug.

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