175 definitions by al-in-chgo

Slightly less risqué way to say "cock ring." Device that fits around penis and/or testicles and has a semi-tourniquet function to hold erections longer.
"Some drugstore. Where the hell do they keep the cock rings?"

"Shhhh."

"Where the hell do they keep the erection rings?"

"Hell if I know. Try 'Adult Pleasures' or 'Family Planning.'"
by al-in-chgo May 30, 2013
"Economic moat" is a term coined by investor Warren Buffet. It means how susceptible a company is to competition by other companies. Coca-Cola and Phillip Morris (Marlboro cigarettes) are companies with wide economic moats because of the popularity and consumer loyalty of their marquee brands. Boeing has a narrow but deep economic moat because its 777 and 787 aircraft are not subject to immediate displacement, but companies like Airbus and Bombardier could play catch-up over the course of several years by developing similar models that would threaten their primacy. That would close the moat.
-- "Give me an example of a company with a wide economic moat."

-- "The local water company, because no competitor can rush right in with a distribution system (pipes)."

-- "Besides, who else is gonna fill that moat? lol."
by al-in-chgo May 03, 2013
Same as "jerk off" (masturbate); also used as a noun to reference a feckless, no-account person, usu. male.

Up until the 1980s, "jack off" was considered more a Southern (USA) locution than "jerk off," which was considered more urban and Northeastern/Midwestern states. Considerable swapping around has taken place in the meantime, probably because of increased social mobility and relaxed codes of censorship.
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1)...All little Timmy can talk about is sex. If I weren't so polite, I'd have told him to go get laid, or to jack off in a corner...

2)...'If y'all boys didn't jack off so much, you might amount to something.'... (closet-case coach to members of the high-school basketball team in 1971 movie THE LAST PICTURE SHOW).
by al-in-chgo April 10, 2011
"Suck On My Cock" is a satirical Christmas send-up, lyrics written by Pacific Northwest shock jock and prolific parodist Bob Rivers and based on the tune of the bestselling "Jingle Bell Rock" by Bobby Helms (1957).

With himself as singer, "Suck On My Cock" was released as part of a Rivers Christmastime satiric CD, and in 2007 as part of Rivers' CD "Rated X Max." Rivers' lyrics graphically recount in first-person the experience of receiving a full and complete act of fellatio by his (possibly) unwilling partner and makes ample use of "Jingle Bell Rock's" tune, multiple stanzas, choruses and chord changes.

The song is offensive, obscene, and politically incorrect but very funny to those who like no-holds-barred satire. It has been covered often in the ensuing years by Matt Rogers and other singers. Downloadable sung versions and lyrics are not difficult to find on the Internet, though good copies of the prior CD releases command a huge premium in the online used-disc market.

If live versions are included, it is hard to measure how high "Suck On My Cock" ranks in Rivers' ample songbook, but it appears to be shaping up as a "guilty" Christmas pleasure along with many of his other Yuletide parodies, such as "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" and "Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire."

Bob Rivers asserts that he still owns copyright to the lyrics.
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-- "God, I couldn't believe it when the band began to play "Jingle Bell Rock" and the singer started off with 'Stroke on my, lick on my, suck on my cock..."

-- "Yeah, hardcore! But it was pretty late and I don't think people minded "blue" material. Hope you listened up, 'cuz I bet the band won't play it for another 364 days."

-- "Yeah OK, fool, but cyberspace never forgets."

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by al-in-chgo October 29, 2010
Slang for male ejaulate (semen), especially as a result of oral sex.

This term probably came into being upon the meeting of bodybuilder culture and its emphasis on whey- and other protein-based powders (dissolved in liquid resluting in a flavored milkshake-like drink), with contemporary gay culture.
Todd, come to my house after school. We'll hole up in my room and do some heavy lifting, hopefully ending in a protein shake or two winks.
by al-in-chgo August 19, 2010
"Jagoff" (sometimes "jag-off") seems to have originated in Pittsburgh but is also recognized in the Midwest as slang for an inept, feckless, contemptible, or generally worthless person, a loser, a "schlemiel."

The term is almost certainly derived from the verb "jack off" (through noun "jack-off") as in "masturbate," but somewhat like the British use of "wanker," it is usually not a direct comment on self-pleasuring, but more of a general term of contempt or deliberate abuse. Like "wanker," "jagoff" is somewhat vulgar and not to be used lightly, and avoided in cultivated speech, but is recognized by all in the regions in which it has currency.

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The book KILLER CLOWN relates that John Wayne Gacy became especially flustered or angry when called a "jagoff." So the police deliberately used that term to throw him off-balance during interrogation.

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by al-in-chgo August 18, 2010
Advertising and promotional slang for a DEad ceLEBrity, especially one whose image can be used in advertising and, through photoshop or other c.g.i. process, can be seen to advocate contemporary products or causes.

Right to use such images can be bought and sold, much like the endorsements and images of still-alive celebrities.
Who's our agency's biggest deleb? It's not James Dean or Marilyn Monroe, it's Albert Einstein!
by al-in-chgo June 20, 2010

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