181 definitions by al-in-chgo

Tumescence in reverse; the process where, after ejaculation, a man's penis shrinks and reverts to "normal" pre-sexual size.
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"I get boners quick but after sex I lose them quick too. My dick goes back to normal size before I can say "detumescence".

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by al-in-chgo March 12, 2010

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"Ain't done it (or dunnit)" is a Deep Southernism for "I emphatically repudiate your last allegation."
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"Who took the last beer in the fridge? Jimmy, was it you?"

"Ain't done it!"
by al-in-chgo March 06, 2010

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(Sometimes called TV Parking.) Not parking for the movies, but the kind of ridiculously easy parking a character in a movie gets when s/he pulls right up to his/her destination, zeroing in on a miraculously wide-open parking spot in what otherwise is an impossibly tight urban area.

During the 1950s and 1960s, in movies and on television, Doris Day got such a rep for manifesting that lucky talent that a spin-off term was coined; see "Doris Day Parking." Generally Ms. Day's roles had her piloting sensible domestic sedans and station wagons, a visual metaphor for her competence, efficiency, self-reliance and ability to live without a man. By way of contrast, the neurotic characters Tony Randall portrayed often struggled with temperamental British roadsters, and Rock Hudson played dissolute types who poured themselves into a taxi -- hungover, drunk, in a hurry, or all three.

Times did change -- a little. On "The Doris Day Show," CBS-TV's' late 1960s career-girl sitcom and vehicle (no pun intended) for Ms. Day, her character drove a 1969 Dodge Charger. A red convertible Charger, on a legal secretary's salary. Modernity notwithstanding, Doris never seemed to have much trouble finding instant parking. In San Francisco. Business-district and high-rise parts of San Francisco. In all fairness, though, the opening credits included a very brief shot of her on the California Avenue cable car.

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In 1985 writer-director-male lead Albert Brooks, playing opposite Julie Hagerty in the film comedy LOST IN AMERICA, saw a movie convention ripe for satire. The lead couple, having had all kinds of bad luck in the Heartland, moves to New York City to find new careers. As the soundtrack blares Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York," their car, shown in exteme high shot, dives (no backing) right into a perfectly sized parking space dead center in front of a white high-rise office building in Midtown Manhattan. This knowing send-up of, and homage to the Movie Parking convention (which fit the plot perfectly) never fails to draw howls from the audience.

"Man, we were so lucky. TV parking in front of the building; the FedEx van had just pulled away."

"You want to see Movie Parking at its finest? Alfred Hitchcock's VERTIGO from 1957. Jimmy Stewart, Kim Novak, Barbara bel Geddes, all drove right up to Jimmy's apartment building, and it seemed to be the same spot perpetually open and waiting for them. Diagonal parking stalls, no less, or as you Midwesterners like to call it, angle parking."
by al-in-chgo February 24, 2010

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Utah fry sauce (also "fry sauce") is a mixture of mayonnaise and ketchup in a 2:1 ratio generally meant for dipping french fries and onion rings, although it can be put on hamburgers. It is attributed to the Utah-based fast-food chain Arctic Circle ca. 1948. However, it also resembles a simplified version of pre-existing Thousand Island dressing. According to Wikipedia, similar sauces are widely known elsewhere, including "mayoketchup" in Puerto Rico, "Burger Sauce," "Pink Sauce" (also "Salsa Rosada" in S. American countries), even "Cockteilsauce."
Provo drive-through loudspeaker: "Would you like _eye _oss with that, Sir?"

Out-of-town customer: "What?"

Loudspeaker: "Utah fry sauce, Sir? Or maybe you'd prefer ketchup? ... Or both?"

Out-of-town customer: "That's fine, thanks."
by al-in-chgo April 28, 2014

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(Note: Two words): Any small unidentifiable residue, globule, or spill, usually sticky or crusty.
"Jenny, I'm not lending you my phone any more. It had foo goo on the face that I had to scrape off. Were you eating fried chicken or what?"
by al-in-chgo October 06, 2013

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"Economic moat" is a term coined by investor Warren Buffet. It means how susceptible a company is to competition by other companies. Coca-Cola and Phillip Morris (Marlboro cigarettes) are companies with wide economic moats because of the popularity and consumer loyalty of their marquee brands. Boeing has a narrow but deep economic moat because its 777 and 787 aircraft are not subject to immediate displacement, but companies like Airbus and Bombardier could play catch-up over the course of several years by developing similar models that would threaten their primacy. That would close the moat.
-- "Give me an example of a company with a wide economic moat."

-- "The local water company, because no competitor can rush right in with a distribution system (pipes)."

-- "Besides, who else is gonna fill that moat? lol."
by al-in-chgo May 03, 2013

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"Jagoff" (sometimes "jag-off") seems to have originated in Pittsburgh but is also recognized in the Midwest as slang for an inept, feckless, contemptible, or generally worthless person, a loser, a "schlemiel."

The term is almost certainly derived from the verb "jack off" (through noun "jack-off") as in "masturbate," but somewhat like the British use of "wanker," it is usually not a direct comment on self-pleasuring, but more of a general term of contempt or deliberate abuse. Like "wanker," "jagoff" is somewhat vulgar and not to be used lightly, and avoided in cultivated speech, but is recognized by all in the regions in which it has currency.

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The book KILLER CLOWN relates that John Wayne Gacy became especially flustered or angry when called a "jagoff." So the police deliberately used that term to throw him off-balance during interrogation.

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by al-in-chgo August 18, 2010

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