al-in-chgo's definitions

puppy-dog book

A used book (overall condition unimportant) that an avid reader "rescues" from a library sale, used-bookstore, clearance shelf, or home of a downsizing relative, without any immediate need for it but in the fear it will be pulped otherwise. The term puppy-dog comes from the similarity to rescuing an animal and taking it home to a house already full of cats and dogs, for fear it would otherwise be euthanized.

"Did you really need to buy DISCOURSES ON LIVY by Niccolo Machiavelli?"
"Well . . . it's a puppy-dog book to me. It's a good clean copy, it was cheap, eventually I may find time to read it, and most of all I couldn't bear the idea of it hitting the recycling bin and sent to print heaven."

by al-in-chgo August 4, 2016

horses and bayonets

Barack Obama's flippant reponse to Mitt Romney's complaint during their third televised debate (October 22, 2012) that the U.S. Navy had fewer battleships than at any time since 1917. Obama's remark that the military has fewer "horses and bayonets, too" makes an analogy that measuring battleships (as opposed to aircraft carriers) is an archaic metric of military power, in much the same way that measuring "horses and bayonets" would no longer indicate an army's might. (NB: Marines are still issued bayonets.)

"The Navy has fewer battleships than at any time since 1917."

"The military has fewer horses and bayonets, too. We live in a different world."

by al-in-chgo October 23, 2012

detumescence

Tumescence in reverse; the process where, after ejaculation, a man's penis shrinks and reverts to "normal" pre-sexual size.

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"I get boners quick but after sex I lose them quick too. My dick goes back to normal size before I can say "detumescence".

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by al-in-chgo March 12, 2010

Scanlator

A scanlator is a person who performs scanlations, which are the unauthorized scanning + translation of a source work, usually a Japanese manga of some sort, into English for dissemination by e-mail or blog.

For more information, see scanlation.

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"Who's the translator on this graphic novel? Or should I say 'scanlator'."

"Scanlator is the word, the person is called "Kuzzy" but there's no full name, e-mail or blog address. They prefer to keep it that way because what they're doing breaks international copyright laws, even in cases of works that have been sitting untranslated into English for years."

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by al-in-chgo April 12, 2010

junk armor

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An athletic supporter, such as a jockstrap or a plastic cup, that protects the male genitals ("junk") against impact or injury.

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"That football hit me right in the crotch! If not for my junk armor I'd be singing soprano now."

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by al-in-chgo March 8, 2010

a/k/a

Abbreviation for "also known as," useful when defining terms that are known under two or more names:

Shortwave radio, a/k/a World Band radio; or

Taiwan a/k/a Formosa.

Also pseudonyms vis-a-vis given names:

Victoria Beckham a/k/a Victoria Adams and Posh Spice.

A simplified use has more recently emerged: simply to type the letters. omitting the slashes (a/k/a "virgules") in between -- it is rare that anyone would confuse "aka" with a word called something like "akk-uh" and "aka" is easier to type:

David Johansen aka Buster Poindexter.

Reginald Dwight aka Elton John.

But both spellings are currently in use:

Do you have any biographical information about writer George Orwell, a/k/a (or aka) Eric Blair?

Although an abbreviation, note that no period is required.

.

from a Wanted poster: Wanted: Johnny Breeze, a/k/a John Brahms, a/k/a John Briscoe, a/k/a John Buchanan . . .

(contributor's note: not a real person).

by al-in-chgo March 5, 2010

Pornality

“PORNALITY” comes from PORN + BANALITY, a misheard or misunderstood (if clichéd) expression that takes on a more graphic or sexualized meaning:

Examples --

HARD-AND-FAST solution becomes “HARDEN-FAST” SOLUTION;

NO-HOLDS-BARRED (wrestling) becomes “NO HOLES BARRED” (stick it anywhere!);

NIP IT IN THE BUD becomes “NIP IT IN THE BUTT";

and, a pornality deliberately scripted for television:

CORNISH GAME HEN became "CORNISH GAY MEN" as mishead by Dick Solomon (John Lithgow) on NBC-TV's "Third Rock from the Sun" (1996-2001).

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"Man, you got a buttload of mail."

"Don't you mean 'boatload'? "Buttload" is a pornality."

"I was gonna say 'shitload'."

"Point well taken."

by al-in-chgo May 13, 2010