50 definitions by Sir Bartholomew McTavish
A 'shit22' is similar to a catch22 situation but in which things are far far worse than anyone could imagine.
In essence, a predicament that you would never, ever wish to find yourself in but people like Paul McCartney, John Leslie, Angus Deaton, Gordon Ramsey and Prince Harry keep finding themselves in.
When your wife says she's leaving you halfway through giving her a damn good seeing to and actually thinking of her.
An 'Oh my shitting christ!' moment.
In essence, a predicament that you would never, ever wish to find yourself in but people like Paul McCartney, John Leslie, Angus Deaton, Gordon Ramsey and Prince Harry keep finding themselves in.
When your wife says she's leaving you halfway through giving her a damn good seeing to and actually thinking of her.
An 'Oh my shitting christ!' moment.
1:) The feeling the dinosaurs had when they saw their friends being vaporised by a shock wave.
2:) When Ginny tells Harry Potter that she's up the duff
3:) Mallory & Irvine's joint feeling at having realised they had forgotten to climb back down.
4:) When Britney realises she's running after K-Fed's car in the nude with half an ounce of coke on her face...a 'shit22'
5:) When Kerry Katona was shown a tape of herself giving herself a Gynaecological examination after coming out of the bath.
2:) When Ginny tells Harry Potter that she's up the duff
3:) Mallory & Irvine's joint feeling at having realised they had forgotten to climb back down.
4:) When Britney realises she's running after K-Fed's car in the nude with half an ounce of coke on her face...a 'shit22'
5:) When Kerry Katona was shown a tape of herself giving herself a Gynaecological examination after coming out of the bath.
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish November 4, 2007
Bond of the 21st century, according to a completely non-gay Daniel Craig loves willy. No longer is it safe to watch TV without a cast of bum diggers suddenly becoming the centre of attention. Doctor Who has become Doctor 'Up the Poo'. Torchwood is 'were there any straight people in this week?'
Well Double 0 Gay is now suffering. Gaymes Bond or James Bummed is the spy hero of the new century.
Well Double 0 Gay is now suffering. Gaymes Bond or James Bummed is the spy hero of the new century.
00Gay's films may include...
Man With the Golden Knob
The Living Gaylights
Gold Wanger
Dr No(b)
Homos Are Forever
The Cock Is Not Enough
Never Say Gay
Moonie Raper
For Your Balls Only
Liscence to Bum
You Only Fuck Men Twice
'Q' would supply weapon-like dildos and his name would actually be short for 'Queer'. 'M' would still be Judy Dench but 'M' would stand for she was a 'Man'
Man With the Golden Knob
The Living Gaylights
Gold Wanger
Dr No(b)
Homos Are Forever
The Cock Is Not Enough
Never Say Gay
Moonie Raper
For Your Balls Only
Liscence to Bum
You Only Fuck Men Twice
'Q' would supply weapon-like dildos and his name would actually be short for 'Queer'. 'M' would still be Judy Dench but 'M' would stand for she was a 'Man'
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish April 2, 2008
Any stocky Austrian,German or Scottish women who should be right heffers but are so physically shaggable that she makes bits of all men bulge to near ejaculating proportions
Mike: Did you see that sixfoot, blonde, German babe from accounting?
Dave: Olga? Yeah, I think she could benchpress a truck.
Mike: Yeah, but she is quite fit.
Dave: She's over there now! Look at those nuggs.
Mike: I've just cum.
Dave: Me too.I've got an OlgaBolger in my grits too.
Dave: Olga? Yeah, I think she could benchpress a truck.
Mike: Yeah, but she is quite fit.
Dave: She's over there now! Look at those nuggs.
Mike: I've just cum.
Dave: Me too.I've got an OlgaBolger in my grits too.
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish April 11, 2008
The real name of a Sex Vampire who bummed a load of Carpathians in Moldavia around the 1st century before Winona Ryder chucks herself in the river for being a klepto. Used to impale people on his four foot dick which he also fought with.
Nad the Impale-Her pornstar name in spoof movie of 'Barb's Stoked U Know's Spankula' from 1993, pisstake of cool Keanu flick.
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish August 15, 2008
Simple straightforward definition.Ordinary is boring. Break the mould, go for the burn, stand out from the crowd, ignore the sheep. Don't become uniform, don't be boredinary.
Man#1: You listen to that new audiobook?
Man#2: Audio what? What the shit?
Man#1: It's a book on CD
Man#2: What the fuck is a book?
Man#1: Pages,bound together,left-to-right reading. You can learn things.
Man#2: You are so boring.Books?You gay?
Man#1: No, you are boredinary, you slave to the system. Stand out man, make yourself unique. Burn your pants! Wank off a chicken or something!
Man#2: Go fuck a horse.
Man#1: Already did, it was your Mother.
Man#2: Audio what? What the shit?
Man#1: It's a book on CD
Man#2: What the fuck is a book?
Man#1: Pages,bound together,left-to-right reading. You can learn things.
Man#2: You are so boring.Books?You gay?
Man#1: No, you are boredinary, you slave to the system. Stand out man, make yourself unique. Burn your pants! Wank off a chicken or something!
Man#2: Go fuck a horse.
Man#1: Already did, it was your Mother.
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish August 22, 2008
'Asstrix' is the story of a Gaulish pornstar that shagged her way through every Roman Legion that Rome sent her way.
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish August 19, 2009
Euphemism: Meaning 'erect penis'
To have a somewhat larger than usual 'semen submersible'
The thing which stands out the most during puberty,
Similar to the Statue of Liberty unveiled on October 28th 1886, except a regular penis does not come with torch, face, stola or sandals. (Usually.)
To have a somewhat larger than usual 'semen submersible'
The thing which stands out the most during puberty,
Similar to the Statue of Liberty unveiled on October 28th 1886, except a regular penis does not come with torch, face, stola or sandals. (Usually.)
Other euphemisms like 'Statue of Puberty' include...
Morning Glory
Bishop's Crosier
Hugh Jwang
Stomp On
Stiffey
A Barred Dock
Morning Glory
Bishop's Crosier
Hugh Jwang
Stomp On
Stiffey
A Barred Dock
by Sir Bartholomew McTavish October 9, 2009