L.MARTIN's definitions
OIL TRADER:..."So we're walking through the park...and we drop a blanket on the grass at the amphitheater...and as I
poured wine for us,I had JEFFREY OSBOURNE come out on stage and sing LOVE BALLAD...at which point I presented her with a 4ct. rock.-and a proposal.Cool,yeah?"
ARMS DEALER:"That is so fucking DIAMOND COMMERCIAL.Don't repeat it to anyone else.Congratulations."
poured wine for us,I had JEFFREY OSBOURNE come out on stage and sing LOVE BALLAD...at which point I presented her with a 4ct. rock.-and a proposal.Cool,yeah?"
ARMS DEALER:"That is so fucking DIAMOND COMMERCIAL.Don't repeat it to anyone else.Congratulations."
by L.MARTIN December 5, 2005
Get the DIAMOND COMMERCIAL mug.A useless legal document easily voided by even the most average of divorce attorneys.What she does'nt get in alimony
or property settlement...she will more than get in CHILD SUPPORT.Why do you think she had them?
or property settlement...she will more than get in CHILD SUPPORT.Why do you think she had them?
DIVORCEE'- "What are we gonna do? I stupidly signed that damn
pre-nup eight years ago.'The fuck was I thinking?"
ATTORNEY- "We're good.Courts care about the welfare of the
child over anything.Did I mention they don't
make you document where...or how you spend child
support payments? Little Emily is worth about
20 grand a month based on his present income.
The judge is a woman.I'll probably get you 25."
DIVORCEE'-"I think I love you."
ATTORNEY-"After this is over we'll do a weekend down in
St.Bartts.Bring your pill."
pre-nup eight years ago.'The fuck was I thinking?"
ATTORNEY- "We're good.Courts care about the welfare of the
child over anything.Did I mention they don't
make you document where...or how you spend child
support payments? Little Emily is worth about
20 grand a month based on his present income.
The judge is a woman.I'll probably get you 25."
DIVORCEE'-"I think I love you."
ATTORNEY-"After this is over we'll do a weekend down in
St.Bartts.Bring your pill."
by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006
Get the PRE-NUP mug.TIPSY-ABOUT TO GET SHUT DOWN ON A DATE-LOSER:"Sex is just so poorly designed."(hiccup)
WOMAN:"Oh?"
LOSER:"Yep.It should be free!":
"Pregnancy free."
"Disease free."
"Barrier free."
"Commitment free."
"Drama free."
"Cost free."
"You know...FREE!"
"...And it should come in nice "8" or higher
packaging."
WOMAN:"Check please."
WOMAN:"Oh?"
LOSER:"Yep.It should be free!":
"Pregnancy free."
"Disease free."
"Barrier free."
"Commitment free."
"Drama free."
"Cost free."
"You know...FREE!"
"...And it should come in nice "8" or higher
packaging."
WOMAN:"Check please."
by L.MARTIN September 23, 2005
Get the FREE mug.1)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that mysteriously becomes
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
less reliable for a woman-the wealthier a man is.
2)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology that has been available-in
at least nine different forms to women-for now about
50 YEARS.(There's only two for men:Condom.Vasectomy.)This means nine different forms BEFORE you even
touch abortion or sterilization...But "unplanned"/unwanted
kids still get here.
3)An EXTREMELY RELIABLE technology-available more to women
than men.Yet newsmedia continues to blame men for
irresponsible breeding.Interesting.I've never met a man
who decided when a baby would be born.
SPORTS ANCHOR:"On the day of the draft-the now rich,young QUARTERBACK
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
found himself served with PATERNITY SUIT papers."
CHICK TO DUDE:"It's okay.I'm on the BIRTH CONTROL pill.My
doctor says I can't get pregnant anyway.I
just want to FEEL you."
SAME CHICK TO GIRLFRIEND 90 DAYS LATER:"I don't know how it
happened.I was'nt planning on this...but I
don't believe in abortion.Sooo..."
by L.MARTIN September 3, 2006
Get the BIRTH CONTROL mug.The clubby,sheltered,cozy world of celebrity in which "THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE" float...That is until the bubble pops.
CELEBRITY NEWS ANCHORCHIK:"When we come back...it appears that
K-FED has had his FAME BUBBLE
popped.We'll tell you by who...stay
with us!"
K-FED has had his FAME BUBBLE
popped.We'll tell you by who...stay
with us!"
by L.MARTIN December 8, 2005
Get the FAME BUBBLE mug.The person in any organization-usually a sports team-who is
good enough to have a lead role.Too bad they're being blocked
by someone already in that coveted spot who's actually quite
good too.
good enough to have a lead role.Too bad they're being blocked
by someone already in that coveted spot who's actually quite
good too.
EXAMPLE 1/BUSINESS WRITER TO COLLEAGUE:"If Dick Parsons is #1
at Time Warner,Jeff Bewkes must be 1A.Surely the guy will get his own company to run someday."
EXAMPLE 2/NFL 1A QUARTERBACKS:David Garrard....Gus Frerotte...John Kitna...Brad Johnson.
at Time Warner,Jeff Bewkes must be 1A.Surely the guy will get his own company to run someday."
EXAMPLE 2/NFL 1A QUARTERBACKS:David Garrard....Gus Frerotte...John Kitna...Brad Johnson.
by L.MARTIN January 15, 2006
Get the 1A mug.BIG MONEY...HAVING AN ARROGANTLY LARGE BANK ACCOUNT.THE KIND OF WEALTH YOU COME TO AT A REASONABLY YOUNG AGE THAT LEADS YOU TO DO THINGS THAT OTHERS GOT TO MUCH LATER IN LIFE I.E.LUXURY BOXES AT THE BALLPARK...HOMES IN ASPEN...MISTRESS ACCOUNTS.
1)"HE'S RAKIN' HEFTY STAMPS AFTER CATCHING THE ENTIRE RUN-UP IN CRUDE OIL."
2)"YEAH SHE FOYNE...BUT YOU KNOW SHE CHECKIN' THAT WALLET FO' STAMPS.HI MAINTENANCE HO'."
3)SURE HE TALKS A GREAT GAME...BUT DOES HE HAVE THE STAMPS TO WRITE A CHECK?
2)"YEAH SHE FOYNE...BUT YOU KNOW SHE CHECKIN' THAT WALLET FO' STAMPS.HI MAINTENANCE HO'."
3)SURE HE TALKS A GREAT GAME...BUT DOES HE HAVE THE STAMPS TO WRITE A CHECK?
by L.MARTIN September 15, 2005
Get the Stamps mug.