Blenderhead91's definitions

turkish bread

(n.) A condition afflicting an unhygenic vagina which may or may not be malodorous and produces little crusty pellets that may adhere to the vulva or collect in the panties. Turkish bread may be a result of any of several infections commonly associated with a woman's pussy or simply the result of not washing one's stanky snatch. Reportedly, turkish bread has a cheese-like flavor and is viewed as a delicacy to be spread on Triscuits or Ritz in some circles.

Nichole's turkish bread finally got to me after after all these years. Night after night of gagging on that crust just got to me; I had to leave.

by Blenderhead91 March 26, 2009

swallow the swan

To perform felatio. To suck a penis.

Francine knows her way around a dick. That chick can play swallow the swan with me any time.

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

taintular cystosis

(n.) a condition in which one has developed a cyst on one's taint. Eventually, it will surface and drain, usually oozing copious quantities of thick pus. Trust me, this hurts.

Phil: How's the taintular cystosis treating you, Bob?

Bob: I got that fucker drained, dude. The relief...it was better than sex! And what came out of it...looked like a half cup of mashed potatos!

Phil: Dude....gross.

by blenderhead91 April 25, 2010

crotch floss

(n.) a towel (or other piece of material such as an article of clothing left in the bathroom by a roomie or sibling) purpose-dedicated to drying the area between one's genitals and rectum and the rectum itself (also the region between the scrotum and the thigh). The towel is grasped in one hand in front of the body, and one hand behind and pulled back and forth vigorously, as if flossing one's teeth, but on a larger and smellier scale.

(v.) to floss one's crotch, using a towel as described above. Telltale evidence is usually left on a towel used for crotch flossing: brown skid marks.

Doug used Jane's tanktop as crotch floss, since she insists upon leaving her clothing on the bathroom floor.

by Blenderhead91 April 8, 2009

Savage Nation

Is a radio talk-show hosted by uber-fascist Michael Savage. Mr. Savage regularly goes on extended rants, extolling his extremely over-stated impact on American society, blaming a multitude of diseases on illegal immigrants, and charging liberals with the various ills that have befallen the United States. He regularly bad-mouths callers who are incouraged to call in and challenge his self-assumed "genius." Michael Savage claims to be "Right of Rush and to the Left of God." He whined incessantly over the course of several days programming about being banned from the U.K. by British Home Secretary Jacqui Smith, a very astute measure on her part. Unfortunately this means that there is one less place in the world to deport this reprobate to, should the American Government ever develop the sense to do so.

People that listen to Savage Nation and actually buy into it make me embarassed to be an American.

by Blenderhead91 May 15, 2009

crotch crustacean

(n.) a pubic louse; the crabs.

I contracted a case of the crotch crustaceans from the trousers I purchased at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. Of course the old lady just ain't buying it...

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker

n.) An astoundingly large penis capable of causing trauma if used for regular vaginal intercourse.

I gave Judy the Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker. She hasn't walked right for a week.

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009