Blenderhead91's definitions

crotch floss

(n.) a towel (or other piece of material such as an article of clothing left in the bathroom by a roomie or sibling) purpose-dedicated to drying the area between one's genitals and rectum and the rectum itself (also the region between the scrotum and the thigh). The towel is grasped in one hand in front of the body, and one hand behind and pulled back and forth vigorously, as if flossing one's teeth, but on a larger and smellier scale.

(v.) to floss one's crotch, using a towel as described above. Telltale evidence is usually left on a towel used for crotch flossing: brown skid marks.

Doug used Jane's tanktop as crotch floss, since she insists upon leaving her clothing on the bathroom floor.

by Blenderhead91 April 8, 2009

choadstool

(n.) a despicable person, especially one who is short and fat, much like a choad, a short, fat dick. Choadstoolism may be associated with short man's disease.

That anus up in human resources is a fucking choadstool: four-foot-nine, 200 pounds, and all of it complete, festering dick.

by Blenderhead91 April 8, 2009

As fresh as a stroll on the beach

A phrase used to describe the odor produced by a woman's vagina. This is a polite way of saying that her vulva smells like dead sea creatures.

Doug: I remember the first time I got into Nicole's panties.

Phil: Oh yeah? What was it like?

Doug: As fresh as a stroll on the beach, man.

Phil: That seems to be everybody's opinion of what her crotch smells like. Rotting salmon, decomposing shrimp, with a hint of dead walrus.

by blenderhead91 April 25, 2010

GOE

Abbreviation for a Gathering of Eagles, a right-wing extremist group who thinks that sending off US Military personnel to overseas conflicts to be killed wholesale and lugged home in body bags (frequently burned to a crisp or dismembered) or alive but heinously physically disfigured or maimed or even left emotionally paralyzed by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, is the best way to support them. This group regularly engages in counter-protests at pro-peace gatherings. Their tactics involve using intimidation, threats, hate-speech, videotaping members of anti-war organizations, and attempting to instigate a violent response through various means of confrontation. GOE members have gone so far as to physically assault grieving members of service members' families who have spoken out against the various wars that the US Government has gotten the nation into. This reprehensible group is opposed by several noble organizations that include Veterans for Peace and the Winter Soldiers. The GOE frequently suggests as "vast liberal conspiracy" involving the media opposes their efforts and calls anyone who opposes their efforts as "moonbats," whatever that is.

Carolyn Swartout is an infamous member of the despicable and often hateful organization known as a Gathering of Eagles (GOE). She has been witness attempting to provoke a violent response at peaceful anti-war gatherings sometimes by using her minor son to instigate a confrontation. She is a coward.

by Blenderhead91 June 8, 2009

Corn Surprise

(n.) The act of discovering the presence of corn in one's bowel movement when you know it's been a long time since you have eaten any corn.

"Hey Liddy! Check out this floater I just pinched off! It's a corn surprise! When was it we last had corn?"

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

Savage Nation

Is a radio talk-show hosted by uber-fascist Michael Savage. Mr. Savage regularly goes on extended rants, extolling his extremely over-stated impact on American society, blaming a multitude of diseases on illegal immigrants, and charging liberals with the various ills that have befallen the United States. He regularly bad-mouths callers who are incouraged to call in and challenge his self-assumed "genius." Michael Savage claims to be "Right of Rush and to the Left of God." He whined incessantly over the course of several days programming about being banned from the U.K. by British Home Secretary Jacqui Smith, a very astute measure on her part. Unfortunately this means that there is one less place in the world to deport this reprobate to, should the American Government ever develop the sense to do so.

People that listen to Savage Nation and actually buy into it make me embarassed to be an American.

by Blenderhead91 May 15, 2009

crotch crustacean

(n.) a pubic louse; the crabs.

I contracted a case of the crotch crustaceans from the trousers I purchased at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. Of course the old lady just ain't buying it...

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009