Wife that 

Verb; A phrase used when talking about wanting to marry that incredibly perfect bitch.

D: Amanda's seriously the nicest chick ever.
DD: Man, I would fucking wife that in a heart beat.

Wife that by BelugaBoy September 22, 2009

That's what I told my first wife. 

Much like the popular phrase "that's what she said", "that's what I told my first wife" can apply to male only references. The first known use was by Michael Thor Lengies Sept. 2012.

Perfect set ups:
"It's doesn't get any harder than this." "That's what I told my first wife."

Sarcastic:
"I always wear condoms." "That's what I told my first wife."

Out of no where:
"I've got a date at 9:00." "That's what I told my first wife."

Self degrading humor:
"I'm just not a one woman man." "Yeah, that's what I told my first wife."

Thats what he said, Thats what she said, Inuendo, Sexual,

That's what I told my first wife. by JoeliusC September 28, 2012

legally blonde and his skunk head wife and there home alone looking receding line twerp of a son that cries himself to sleep and still wets the bed 

Lucius, narcissa, and draco malfoy

I hate legally blonde and his skunk head wife and there home alone looking receding line twerp of a son that cries himself to sleep and still wets the bed.

legally blonde and his skunk head wife and there home alone looking receding line twerp of a son that cries himself to sleep and still wets the bed by buttery orbreese May 27, 2021

National thats your wife but I’m fuckin her day 

When you married to a bitch but every year somebody else got have sex with her.

I know that your wife but I gotta clap her cheeks for national thats your wife but I’m fuckin her day.

National thats your wife but I’m fuckin her day by Sleezy Breezy June 26, 2019