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touchin' cotton 

A phrase used to describe that awkward moment when you have to dump so bad that the poop has actually exited your anus and is toucing your tighty whitey Hanes cotton underwear.
Andy: Hey Floyd, you gotta pull over. I have to take a dump.
Floyd: Can't you wait 10 more minutes!! We're almost there.
Andy: No Floyd, I can't wait!! I'm touchin' cotton!!!
touchin' cotton by Twist Weeblow August 26, 2007

Asshole Torching 

Taking a blowtorch to an asshole for pleasure or hair removal. Some people like it rough and some people like it bare. You can decide but watch out for its side effects: pungent smell of burnt asshole, burnt/darkened dicks, permanent scarring over the asshole, inability to poop.
"My boyfriends dick is darker than usual, I think he was asshole torching."
Asshole Torching by DICK burn November 16, 2016

Touching tips 

A well-guarded secret greeting amongst men that may only occur in the absence of women. It is performed by pressing the tips of two penises together, head on, forming a straight veiny line. Verbal consent is strongly recommended and eye contact is not advised. Can be used to determine if a male is circumsided without creating an awkward or uncomfortable situation.
"Hello there fine Sir, interested in Touching Tips?"
"Of course, how could one turn down such a reasonable request."
*touches tips together*
"Perfect, but I couldn't help but notice that you're circumcised."
"What a keen and correct observation that you have made."
Touching tips by Fromundo June 20, 2016
the act of pretending to be drunk to get with drunk women
Harry must have been tuching last night to hook up with all those girls, I didn't see him drink anything all night.
tuching by tuchman1 June 22, 2009

Traffic Touching 

A game in which you drive up next to another in traffic and touch the side of their car while still driving ahead.
"Oh dude, we'll totally do some traffic touching after work."
Traffic Touching by ImNotNobody February 8, 2015

touching fish

A work ethic based on laziness as protest against current work culture in which

high productivity is demanded without sufficient reward or incentive.
- Yo bro, where's Tony? He's been gone for 30 minutes...
- I think he's in the bathroom touching fish.
touching fish by Shizibizan January 19, 2021