*Man with clean shave walks into room*
Woman without pogonophilia: "Finally - there's a cutie."
Woman with pogonophilia (pogonophile): "Hmm... he's cute, maybe."
*Man with beard walks into room*

Woman with pogonophilia: "Now that's a man."
Woman without pogonophilia: "What about food getting stuck in it?"
*Woman with pogonophilia is already talking to man with beard*

phone: why don’t you go to sleep tommy it’s 2 in the morning?
tommy:why don’t you die you dumbazz

Kate: I love Bill Bailey, hes so hot
Beth: You're such a pogonophile