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A boil on the ass of society 

Someone who is literally a pain in the ass. Not only to one or several people but to society as a whole.
"Stop with your complaining, you are quickly becoming a boil on the ass of society".

I wouldn't use it to hit a dog on the ass

Used to describe something that has no value, doesn't taste good, doesn't look good, doesn't work and is inferior.
"Have you heard the new XYZ CD?" Matt asked Janine.
"Yup. Sucks. I wouldn't use it to hit a dog on the ass." Janine replied.

mentally unstable camels jumping over the autistic sheep got ran over by a dead turtle doing 190 on the highway 

gosh im so glad mentally unstable camels jumping over the autistic sheep got ran over by a dead turtle doing 190 on the highway

getting sloppy on the A 

the act of giving and/or receiving oral sex in the middle of avonworth high school’s lenzner field on the avonworth logo
“aw damn i heard fiona was getting sloppy on the A. i didn’t even think people really did that.”

Call me a witches' hat and slap me on the arse 

A common Aussie slang term usually used when something exciting or unexpected happens.
"Man, call me a witches' hat and slap me on the arse, that was unexpected."

Snap Backing The (ThE) (tHe) (a) (An) (A) (an( Comma (comma) (&) (,) The Ol(L)d D(d)usty Ass-w(W)iped Trail (A (The-An) Postal Code 10457-2219 On The Topic Of Zipper's Code)... 

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Snap Backing The (ThE) (tHe) (a) (An) (A) (an( Comma (comma) (&) (,) The Ol(L)d D(d)usty Ass-w(W)iped Trail (A (The-An) Postal Code 10457-2219 On The Topic Of Zipper's Code)...