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Lemeard is also known as Leaky, because of his constant fear that the enemy will be able to see through his smoke screens. And this is why:
"I want all my mortars to fire at the same time!"
"What?"
"All of them! I don't want anything left between me and the enemy!"
"But sir..."
"Do it now."
"Yes sir!"
And they did so. The enemy couldn't see through their smokescreen. And they were hit by the barrage. By the hundreds.
Somehow... Lemeard survived.
His troops, on the other hand, lost almost half their battalion's strength. Even though they fired at an area where there weren't many soldiers.
"It doesn't matter if we lose men," said Lemeard. "They are just dead weight anyway."
The next day he ordered mortar rounds to be filled with explosive powder. And even though the shells were filled with enough explosives to take out a whole village, not one single round missed its target. Not a single soldier escaped alive from the bombardment.
Leaky Lemeard was scared when the smoke screen lifted.
lemeard by FelisSilvestris May 22, 2023
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A person who is exceptionally adept at being clueless about what is happening around them. More often than not, a lemeard will respond in such a way that no one around him or her understands what the lemeard is trying to say. Because they have such a hard time interacting at social gatherings, they are often misconstrued as being very boring, although fun to laugh at, people and are called lameards to accentuate their overall lameness.
What the fuck is that lemeard janitor trying to say to those kids? "Hey you, lameard, shut the fuck up because nobody cares!"
lemeard by Jihy August 21, 2007
Related Words
My friend is a lemtard. People wanna hang with him all the time.
lemtard by pukepukepuke December 5, 2018

bang a you-ee 

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"
hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee
Word of the Day on July 19, 2026
The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.
"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"
Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013
Word of the Day on July 18, 2026
To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.
"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."
Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026
Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

Hair spider

A tight, tangled knot of loose hair and lint that forms inside clothing during the clothes dryer cycle. It typically hides inside garments, causing an annoying lump or a phantom tickling sensation against the skin until it is found or falls out onto the floor during folding.
I was folding my clothes and a huge hair spider fell out onto my hand
Hair spider by Kmorsels July 15, 2026
Word of the Day on July 16, 2026