When you’re waiting on hold for someone and know that the second you answer another call or check another line they’ll answer and hang up when you don’t answer right away.
I’ve been a hold hostage for 8 minutes now. I know that if that whore in accounts receivable picks up when I try and answer this other line she’ll disconnect.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Masturbating
Choking the chicken
Beating the bishop
Slap boxing the one-eyed champ
Taking matters into your own hands
Squeezing the cream from the flesh twinkie
Having a date with Pam and her five friends
Having a tug-o-war with the cyclops
"the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger."
Choking the chicken
Beating the bishop
Slap boxing the one-eyed champ
Taking matters into your own hands
Squeezing the cream from the flesh twinkie
Having a date with Pam and her five friends
Having a tug-o-war with the cyclops
"the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger."
"Jeremy, finding himself all alone, with a ready supply of porn, decided to take his sausage hostage."
by Johnny Pot Smoker September 5, 2003
by Anonymous September 28, 2003
by blotter November 17, 2003
Chris: Hey Jack, whats an entertaining way to masturbate?
Jack: Try holding the sausage hostage.
Chris: Oh my god it works!
Jack: Try holding the sausage hostage.
Chris: Oh my god it works!
by the big bum December 9, 2020
Chris: Hey Jack, whats an entertaining way to masturbate?
Jack: Try holding the sausage hostage.
Chris: Oh my god it works!
Jack: Try holding the sausage hostage.
Chris: Oh my god it works!
by the big bum December 9, 2020
Nah...
Hym "I think you're holding happiness hostage. 'You don't deserve to be happy unless you adopt one of the acceptable axiomatic frameworks of perception and if your refuse to do it I'm justified in cannibalizing you.' Is what you're really saying. No. Not doing it AND I'm not going to let you punish me for not doing it. I'll punish you for trying to punish me. You'll look like an complete idiot. I'll do the thing I was going to do anyway. Everybody wins."
by Hym Iam August 14, 2023