fauxlosopher

Someone who thinks they know everything and try to act super smart by saying very little. A lot like a philosopher, but just not. at all. Fauxlosophers tend to attend an art school.

*at McDonalds*
-How may I help you?
-3 but yet 4, what shall I help you with?
-GTFO out my store fauxlosopher!
-I have freedom; freedom of mind. Society has clogged your mind--
*tasered to the ground*

fauxlosopher by 'tisme! December 30, 2011

Facebook Fauxlosopher

A 'Facebook Fauxlosopher' is someone who scours the internet in search of 'inspirational quotes, song lyrics, words of wisdom or in fact, anything that is more intelligent and creative than what they can come up with.

They will then use these in there Facebook status updates (often under the guise that they have created them) in an attempt to appear intelligent and deep. Typically used by young girls and guys trying to get into young girls panties.

Typical examples of a 'Facebook Fauxlosopher' trying to seem deep and intelligent...

"Sometimes I've gotta close my eyes just to open up my soul"
"Honesty may be the best policy but insanity is the best defence..."
“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”

Facebook Fauxlosopher by Gypo_bmx January 9, 2013

Fauxlosophy 

The imparting of make belief wisdom, spiritual advice and meaningless waffle, usually given by vacuous self absorbed 'influencers' via a social media platform. Generally accompanied by a bikini clad pose in some exotic location and/ or a generic borderline inspirational quote, borrowed from a slightly more creative part time yoga teacher/ uber driver/ photographer/ long boarder/ spiritualist. On occasion a real quote from a real philosopher may be used but often in the incorrect context.

“Life takes you to unexpected places, love brings you home”

Thankful for every moment I get to spend home. Even the quick trips like this make my heart smile. I appreciate every little moment with my family and friends and thankful for those truck rides down old country roads, loving from my horses and many days and night on this beautiful lake. Home is good for the soul✨ "

Correct response: "Shut up Amber with your fauxlosophy, you fucking nitwit"
Incorrect response: "aww babe you are so cute" followed by countless fire emojis

Fauxlosophy by Calum with one L November 8, 2019

Facelosopher 

One who uses Facebook as a means to covey how enlightened and insightful they are. A facelosopher's statuses are characterized by strong opinions, advice, and phrases they believe will one day be quoted.

Thug 1: "Did you see Chuck's status today talkin' 'bout living righteously and how condoms should be mandatory?"
Thug 2: "Yeah, that fool trippin'. He ain't nothin' but a Facelosopher."

Facelosopher by DaGrango December 8, 2011

fauxlosophy 

Portmanteau of "faux" and "philosophy," literally "fake knowledge"

Pertains to any extended and long-winded argument that may make sense, but has absolutely no meaning whatsoever or use in any real-life context.

Also has nothing to do with the actual study of knowledge and metaphysical understanding.

"If you like catgirls, you are a furry."

"Wait, what? Where did that come from? Besides, catgirls have fur on the ears only, while furries are furry everywhere. There's a clear distinction."

"But where is the logical distinction between where furries end and catgirls begin? Is there a limit? If a catgirl has a single strand of fur on her arm, does that make her a furry?" And what is the catgirl transforms into a furry, what is she then? How can we distinguish what is catgirl from what is furry? This is truly the question of our times."

"Your fauxlosophy is ridiculous, and somewhere Aristotle is rolling over in his grave."

fauxlosophy by Daem0n October 26, 2011