xinohusk
1. A transcendental state of being — forged in the depths of internet depravity — where
one man becomes more goon than human.
2. The final boss of goon. The omega
gooner. The kind of entity who doesn't *see* content, he *absorbs* it.
3. A creature so far removed from restraint that even algorithms tremble in anticipation of his next click.
Traits of xinohusk:
* Opens 97 tabs before breakfast — all running in 480p for nostalgia.
* Can goon to the *idea* of a shape.
* Has five monitors, and none are for productivity.
* Types with one hand. Scrolls with the other.
* Once edged for six hours to a GIF of Bayonetta blinking.
* Finds Walmart mannequins compelling.
* Hunted across cyberspace by firewalls and exorcists alike.
Victims of his goonery include:
* Pokémon (
yes, even the ones shaped
like ice
cream cones)
* Snowbunnies with Air Force 1s and daddy issues
* Goth baddies with septum piercings and existential dread
*
Furries in
heat
* Trashcans with suspicious curvature
Synonyms: The Goonfather. The Edge Apostle. Chrome Incognito Mode’s #1 shareholder.
Opposite: NoFap
monk.
Warning: Exposure to xinohusk
may cause involuntary
tab opening, loss of productivity, and an overwhelming urge to create obscure folders named “Content.”
"
Bro, I thought I was deep in the sauce until I
saw xinohusk’s folders. That man
goons to JPEG compression artifacts."
