A former US Navy officer who loves watching TV. He often sits with a remote in his hand, patting the sofa as if it were a ship. The most famous Sofa Captain is Captain Earl Pickles, USN Ret.
Earl: Hey Nelson, you want to sit here with your favorite Sofa Captain? I think 'The Flintstones' is on.

Nelson: You are a such a goof! Of course I'll sit there with you.

Earl: (like a sea captain) Aye aye! Clear sailing ahead, matey!

Nelson: (like a sea captain) Arrgh, the goodship Flintstones dead ahead!

Opal: Anybody want some brownies and milk? Sofa Captains needs their snacks, you know!
by Dusty's Baby Powder January 21, 2011
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A position of authority where you have full control of a sofa and who sits on it. Nobody is allowed to sit on the sofa unless they say, "Permission to board, sir?"
"Captain Sofa" originated from a Pickles comic:

Opal: *Sits on the sofa*

Earl: *Clears throat*

Opal: Forget it. I don't care if you ARE Captain Sofa. I'm not saying "Permission to board, sir?" every time I sit down here.
by Someone who kinda exists March 9, 2022
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