A necrophillic is an intelligent person who uses the free enviornmental method of 'recycling'.
They make use of dead and deceased carcus' to sexually arouse themselves.
There are Pros and Cons of being a necrophillic
Pros:
- Recycle dead bodies
- Work with a proven effective method of safe sex (The other person isn't even alive!)
- Get turned on and have sex for FREE
- About
300 years worth of
people to choose from
- Save countless amount of women who are still alive and do not want to have sex
- A
chance to make
people who died virgins have the time of their
life!
- You get a free 'Hello my name is <XXX> and I am a Necrophillic' badge when you join the National Necrophilic Nice-guys associaton
- Cannot contract ANY sexually transmitted diseases!
- If you are a quiet person, this is the job/hobby for you!
- Virtually all dead bodies swallow, spew (if you make them), take anal, and do anything you want them to!
Cons:
- Might get haunted by dead
people (see Silent Hill)
- Not a good alternative if you want to start a
family and have a
baby
- Might have some trouble putting body parts back together
- Might find 'dud' bodies that turn to dust when you touch them
- Cannot have sex with a dead body and take it on a date to restaurants. Well, you can, but there is no guarentee your partner
will pay the
food bill.
- Cannot guarentee that if you are a heterosexual that you
will be able to determine the sex of your dead body
- Hard to find a job and get a decent pay because the taxes are high. For example Grave Digging tax, Grave opening Tax, Grave lifting and maintenance Tax
"Ooohh, oohh
Jonathon Draldrow (1792-1843), do you like it when I poke your pelvis with my
hard genital. Do you like it when I slap my genital all over your empty eye sockets? You love that, don't `cha. That's right
Jonathon, I'm a professional necrophilic"
