Monterey 

A city on the central coast of California where all high school and college students claim there is nothing to do.

Jim: Hey what do you wanna do today?
Dan: I dunno dude. There's nothing to do in Monterey.

Monterey by chaychel October 14, 2011

Monterey 

A place where you're sick if you're Italian or Sicilian and rock all stars/world series gear from five years ago. It is common to think you are "legit" if you smoke weed and/or drink profusely. In addition, everyone has hooked up with everyone, and aids is an epidemic. To top it off, allllll of the white kids listen to 2pac, Mac Dre, and Andre Nickatina as they drive around in their daddy's car.

Let's go to Monterey! Where the girls are easy and the weed is dank but there's nothing fun to do besides hit on people at the mall or walk on the wharf!

Monterey by Siq wit it June 28, 2008

Monterey 

A very annoying guy who gets in your business and will tell rumors about you all the time.

Monterey just said u like someone is that true?
no!

Monterey by kittycatthat1 November 16, 2018

Monterey Jack Minaj 

A Wisconsin style threesome involving two women and one male who engage in the act of sexual intercourse involving Kwik-Trip or equivalent type cheese.

Did you hear about Juan Hollywood yesterday? He was arrested for seducing two female police officers out of a traffic violation in a Kwik-Trip parking lot! He fashioned a pair of Monterey-Jack handcuffs and sharp cheddar anal beads, and told the arresting officers it was just your typical "Monterey Jack Minaj." What a boss!

Monterey Jack Minaj by Herbie Jones March 31, 2021

Monterey Rub 

Simultaneously fingerbanging two women.
Also known as Nantucket Rigging or Clam-gunning.

I Monterey Rubbed Joyce and Brenda at the movie theater while the previews played.
I Nantucket Rigged Felicia and Naomi in stirrupped beds while watching Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang.
Maria and Phoebe wanted me to clam-gun them like an AMC Gremlin in-line six engine.

Monterey Rub by norm the plum December 1, 2015

Monterey Effect 

A bizarre sliding scale phenomenon where the opposite sex becomes more desirable as their numbers decrease in proportion to the same sex in a small geographic area. The greater the difference in proportion, the greater the opposite sex's desirability is increased. First identified on the Monterey Peninsula in California in 1989, there were almost 100,000 single men at Fort Ord and other military installations which greatly increased the number of single men compared to single women.

Dude, take her out of this sausage fest and she's nothing more than a four, maybe 5 at best. The Monterey Effect strikes again.

Thanks to the Monterey Effect, even the most disgusting land-a-tee can get laid.

Monterey Effect by El Sadado December 30, 2007

Monterey Park 

Asia-Town USA. Also referred to as MPK, or Asian Retirement Town. City where "suck my" is pronounced "Chuck-Maw", "Iran" is pronounced "E-Lawn", and "626" is pronounced "Chick-too"Chick".

You know you have reached the city's boundaries as you drive down the 10 FWY and the freeway speed somehow comes down to 40-45 MPH, which is mostly due to beloved MPKians entering and exiting the freeway at an average of about 27 MPH.

City where 18wheelers pass passenger cars going at least 30 miles faster. Where Mercedes and Beemers are going about as fast as the China man riding his beachbike in the sidewalk.

City that's dead as funk when other cities are popping (Friday and Saturday nights) and is HAPPENING when other cities are dead as funk (Saturday and Sunday mornings). City where even B of A has Chinese translation next to its name, all restaurants are packed like slave ships at all hours of the day and week and business hours are noted as "We Open Seven Days". As if they're gonna close the funk down on the 8th day!

City where green means stop and red means go; turn signals don't mean shiet and you see beloved MPKians making left turns with right turn signals on and vise versa.

Lastly, MPK is the #1 exporter of Asian girls into white boy crowds of hollywood clubs and OC pubs, where they enter the city wearing banana pants and hello kitty shirts and exit a few years later to search for their whities wearing fake lashes and colored contacts.

I'm in Monterey Park repping chick-too-chick... chuck-maw-dik-foo!

Forget MPK. I'm heading to OC. can I borrow your lashes tonight?

Monterey Park by RonModa November 21, 2010