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A WW2 Vet'rin that used to be a seaman and sang for the glee club way before those turds on FOX. He is wheelchair-bound and a little tin-eared (from a bomb that blew up next to him in dubyadubyatwo). He is an avid boater and duck hunter and employs a funny little Mexican kid named Pico to help him pick daisies and fix the gawd-damned tay-vay.

If you ain't got a good deal on a 52' Hatteras, Kissel don't like dat and his wife don't like dem prices!
Kissel: "I got water allll over the place! When ya comin' over to fix my sink??"

Plumber: "I don't know no Kissel! Hey, buddy, I think you got the wrong party!"
by Kissel Krooner December 14, 2010
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A regrettable action of despair and stupidity brought on by a massive coke binge.
I was blowing lines like a hoover and wanted some ass so I cashed in my Student Loans to buy more blow and a hooker. When I woke up I saw it was a tranny, I pulled a Kissel
by partyinatpsu March 23, 2010
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1. A substitution of words to the song "A Bushel and a Peck" from Guys and Dolls. Only used when one does not know the words to the song.

2. A british man that comes to New York and can't get rid of his accent.

3. A british pie that is usually used to be thrown in the face.

4. A fancy way to say kiss.
1. Instead of singing:
I love you, a bushel and a peck!
A bushel and a peck, and a hug around the neck!
A hug around the neck, and a barrel and a heap
A barrel and a heap, and I'm talkin' in my sleep.
About you.
About you!
About you!

One sings:
I love you, a kissel on the cheek...
A kissel on the cheek and a kissel on the neck... etc.

2. Oh my... that is a fat ass kissel!!!

3. WOW! That's a big ass kissel!!!

4. Jeez! That was a long ass kissel!!!
by alekra February 04, 2009
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Pronounced- kiss-els.

We like to kiss and cuddle all the time. (sickening, I know) It naturally got shorted to this. A very cute word that I think couples will appreciate.
Come here and give me some kissels babe.

Cant wait to get home and give you lots of kissels.
via giphy
by Llamaontherun March 02, 2019
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Someone who got all A's in high school and college
I failed a physics test and tried to pull a kissel on the next one, but I couldn't and I failed again.
by frank1994 October 18, 2018
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