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CODstipation 

When a Call of Duty (COD) kill is so epic, that all you can hear from other players is loud groaning, as if they were suffering from constipation. On rare occasions, when the kill is too epic for CODstipation alone, players actually are so excited that they shit themselves.
Cam: Oh, look at this! It's a Tomahawk Game winning kill!
Will: (groans)
Cam: Sounds like someone has CODstipation
CODstipation by CamMac0604 February 20, 2011
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Constipation Proclamation 

The declaration that all must eat fruit and food high in bran to help the flow of certain things coming out of the body
The president signed the constipation proclamation stating all must eat vegetables and fruits, and things high in bran

vacation constipation 

Losing the ability to poop when you lose that home field advantage.

May be a result of changes in eating and drinking habits, elevation, fiber intake, stress, etc.

Vacation constipation is usually followed by a glacier dump.
I'm having a horrible case of vacation constipation...can't wait to get back home and drop a couple belt notches.
vacation constipation by nofx9019 September 6, 2010

constipation 

when you've gotta go, but you're ass says no
chips got constipation
constipation by botaf November 11, 2003

Verbal constipation 

Verbal constipation is when you have a lot on your mind to say but you ether don't have the courage to say it or simply choose not to. Verbal constipation when pent up can cause depression, stress, anger and self doubt ETC.
Shane: Hey did Alex ever get that stuff off his chest to Danielle?

Josiah: No he has verbal constipation man... He haven't said a word and he is really down on himself.
Verbal constipation by Oglefro August 1, 2013

constiplation

to spend hours on the toilet pondering life
I had a gallon of cheese dip so I spent the rest of the evening in constiplation that great men crap alike.

mental constipation 

An inability to articulate one's thoughts or ideas, resulting in significant psychological distress and frustration.

Typically, this form of cognitive impaction is self-resolving. However, in cases where productive interchange with the afflicted is urgently needed, a deadline may be administered; indeed, this has proven to be one of the most effective treatments for stubborn cases of mental constipation.
Mark: "So, you know, it's like... uh, er... damn, you know, that, uh... thing!"
Dave: "Yeesh. It's too bad that they don't make a laxative for mental constipation!"
Word of the Day on December 5, 2007
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Throat Sweats 

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Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
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square grouper

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