piss turtle

Surprise moment when a guy is pissing ( after having to hold it for an extremely long time ) and at the height of the stream he has an urge to shit. The brown turtle head wants out. Now begins the coordinated effort in continuing to piss while keeping from shitting yourself.

Dude I was at a wedding and after about the fifth toast I was about to piss myself. I got to the bathroom and out of now where I had a piss turtle situation on my hands.

by Irish don June 26, 2014

Garden turtle

A bloke who sucks himself off watching wetsuits dry on the clothesline

Get out of here Blake you dirty garden turtle!!!!

by Uncy Joe April 18, 2018

Turtle kid

A turtle kid is a kid who is super chill but has a crackhead sense of humor and has a bad obsession with their turtle and probably something else. Overall, a good friend to have, just don't get them on the topic of turtles or they'll never shut the hell up.

Person one: hey did you see Jerry over there, does he always stare at his turtle lovingly like that?
Person two: Yeah, Jerry is such a turtle kid

by mizukei November 27, 2020

Homosexual Turtle

A college-aged, Caucasian male individual with an overtly long neck and deep-throating skills made for sucking dick. He has yet to come out of his shell completely.

Taylor: You should go out with Blake M...
Me: I can’t, you know he’s a Homosexual Turtle!

by Trumpette.xxx May 6, 2021

Tony the turtle

A black piece of shit the can't find his father.

When Tony the turtle tried to find his father , he realized that his father left for a hot white middle schooler.

by Slim Jim of Torture December 13, 2016

Turtle Shock

When you fuck your girl turtle style and she can't walk for 24 Hours

I gave my girl turtle shock

by LAGOUT July 20, 2019

Toxic Turtle

Foul smelling faecal matter which either does not flush or will be accompanied by some form of staining of the toilet bowl. Due to their unpleasant after-effects (especially the long lasting, extremely offensive smell) toxic turtles have the effect of dissuading any person from coming too close to the toilet for a considerable amount of time. (hence the reference to "toxic").

John came over to our place on saturday. After dinner, he released a toxic turtle. Everyone was so grossed out that we could not go near the toilet for at least two hours.

by house rules July 6, 2009