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Paranoid lesbian theory

For men, The fear that the girl you like will turn out to be gay.
“Man I really like Jessica, but I’ve got a paranoid lesbian theory”
by Jlo13 March 18, 2018
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Laser Tag Theory

The Laser Tag Theory is something that you have high expectations on a particular thing or activity. But when it comes to fulfilling that thing and/or activity, it is very underwhelming.
Dude i finally went to play a game of Dodge ball with Josh.

Oh damn about time! How was it?

I mean, it was cool. Honestly it could've been a little better.

Shit man, That's the laser tag theory for you
by Hellpablo June 15, 2020
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Elffy’s duty theory

Plenty of unusual theories about the Year end wet season, also responsible for altering forecasts dramatically, to the idea that 5G transmitters that are behind the cause of climate fluctuations. There’s been no shortage of hard-to-believe ideas.

It's clear that if anyone took this idea seriously, it would be very dangerous to public health; fortunately, I don't think anyone does. Unfortunately, “Elffy’s duty” is a known fact to a group in Singapore called Ton Complete Group(TCG), occurs only every 2 days of Elffy’s(member of TCG) rota shift duty.
“Elffy tomorrow you duty ah? Confirm rain one ah”

“The rain fucking heavy sia here at Banyan”

“I think the the weather tomorrow like Elffy duty sia”

“ Elffy’s duty theory is a fact now”
by anonymous September 25, 2020
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Dead Tooth Theory

In a competition, there are two clear favorites and then some other garbage. One of the favorites has to take a loss. When this happens, the other competitors cannot be moved ahead of the loser simply because of the loss. See example for correct application of said theory.
Per Colin Cowherd:
I would still rank Alabama and LSU 1 and 2 after this weekend if the game is close. Just because one of these teams has to take a loss doesn’t mean that the other undefeated teams out there are suddenly better. It’s like a beauty contest where there are two clear favorites and another girl has a dead tooth. The results are announced and one hot girl edges the other. Does that mean that you drop the loser below the girl with the DEAD TOOTH?!?!?! NO!!! And Oklahoma State, Boise State, and Oregon all have a dead tooth. It’s the Dead Tooth Theory.
by THE_HERD November 4, 2011
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Shiv & Baz Theory

The theory states that the universe was always the universe and when the universe grows so big it collapses on itself starting the big bang that creates the next universe. This sets the basis for the basic laws of physics e.g. time is relevant. This theory has been proven by Oppenheimer himself and Jordan Kilfoyl.
While the universe is ending another is starting, such a Shiv & Baz Theory.
by 99.95%atar_student October 23, 2023
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Syrian Loophole Theory

As being gay is illegal in Syria, by saying the phrase 'no homo' it makes gay sex perfectly fine. Thus allowing the homies to have a bonding session without punishment
Chris: "Hey Darren, the cops are here. What do we do?"
Darren: "Don't worry Chris, just say no homo which will allow us to keep commiting the big gay sex due to the Syrian Loophole Theory"
by IFatalRaiderI December 30, 2020
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Josh Mullinum Theory

The scientific theory stating dust is gendered. The evidence in support of noble prize winning theory is the fact that french people are incredibly advanced on the basis that the french language has gendered words for all objects.
They are advanced due to God created males from male dust particles and females from female dust particles.
"Nikola Tesla was half as smart as the guy who invented the Josh Mullinum theory."
"Wow, he is so smart", he might be able to make a theory 1% as smart as the Josh Mullinum theory."
"Many speculate that the Josh Mullinum theory was created by aliens due to the highly advanced inhuman ability of thought used to create the theory."
by Josh Mullinum January 6, 2021
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